


After the War: The Remnant

by GodfreyRaphael



Series: After the War [3]
Category: Animorphs - Katherine A. Applegate
Genre: Alien Abduction, America but with aliens, Gen, It starts on Earth but goes to space, The Empire is still out there, The real Part Two of After the War, United States Space Force, just not in the way you think
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:56:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 27,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21817015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GodfreyRaphael/pseuds/GodfreyRaphael
Summary: The Yeerk Empire was not totally defeated when the Andalites finally arrived on Earth to help the Animorphs end the invasion once and for all. Earth for them was just a battlefield; a very costly one for sure but still just a battlefield. Dozens of planets and host species are still under the iron-fisted rule of the Yeerks, but the defeat at Earth has cost the Empire dearly. There are rumors of numerous factions splitting away from the rule of the Council of Thirteen and fighting their own wars.But on Earth, life goes on for the humans, the Hork-Bajir, and the Yeerks left behind by the defeated invasion. They don't know much about the war in the stars nor do they really care, as long as nothing happens on Earth once again. But when Controllers start getting abducted by Horks in broad daylight, everyone figures that something is definitely up. Is the war between the Yeerks and Andalites about to return to Earth, or is it actually a war between Yeerks and Yeerks? Whatever happens, one thing is for certain: this is going to suck.
Relationships: Original Female Character/Original Male Character
Series: After the War [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1132634
Comments: 3
Kudos: 2





	1. Meet Jane Young

My name is Jane.

First name Jane, last name Young. And that’s all that I’m going to tell you about me, at least as far as identification goes. But I will let you in on a secret of mine: I’m a Controller. A voluntary Controller at that, although I certainly didn’t start off that way. What in the world is a Controller, I’m sure you’re not asking (unless you’ve been living underneath a rock for over two decades), and what the heck is the difference between a voluntary one and an involuntary? But I’ll humor my own question anyway. A Controller is someone who has a Yeerk inside their head, attached to their brain and able to control every single movement and read every thought. A voluntary Controller is someone who agreed to let that Yeerk into their head while an involuntary obviously didn’t. However in the present there is literally no way for anybody to be an involuntary Controller since all the free Yeerks are now closely monitored by the authorities for any abuses, and every Yeerk eligible for hosting had to both pass a background check and be vetted by at least two or three other Yeerks (I can’t remember how many specifically) before they could even be considered for addition to the pool of host-able (I’m sure that that’s not a real word) slugs.

Yeah, yeah, I know. I just called a Yeerk a slug. Big whoop. But if I’ve got a Yeerk in my head then how come I call them slugs for time to time a lot of the other voluntaries out there have nothing but positive things to say for their worms? Well, like I said earlier, I didn’t start off as a voluntary. But my present circumstances meant that for all intents and purposes, I needed a Yeerk in my head in order to become a functional human being once again.

Like many former and current Controllers, my association with the Yeerks started with the Sharing. However, unlike many, I didn’t join the Sharing because I felt the desire or need to belong to something bigger, or even just to improve the quality of life of people. No, my reasons were much more selfish: I joined the Sharing so I could get extra credits to my name and hopefully get into the college of my dreams. If only my fifteen-year-old self had known what was in store for me, I probably would have just joined the Scouts or volunteered for the Red Cross or donated to the Salvation Army. But joining the Sharing looked like it was much easier than anything involving those other organizations that I had mentioned. Besides, all I knew about the Sharing back then was that they did picnics at the park and the beach and went on field trips to the Gardens so it had seemed like a no-brainer back then.

Long story short, I got in way too deep with the Sharing. I wanted to go for that full membership because I thought that that would look really good on my college application, make me look like I’m really committed to the cause. Only when it was too late did I find out that full membership in the Sharing actually involved putting one of these little gray slugs into my ear so it could crawl up to my brain and take control of my body. I wasn’t willing to go that far just to get into my favorite college but the Sharing, well, they wouldn’t take no for an answer, as many a former Controller will attest. The next thing I know, two aliens with blades all over their bodies were shoving my head into this gray sludge and something was crawling into my ear, which was painful at first but then either my body got used to the sensation or my ear went numb and I could no longer sense pain from my ear. Sure, there was something still in there crawling even further inside but’s it like getting an injection of anesthesia; I can only sense and not really feel.

And that was how I met Lilly, or Lilten Eight-Six-Two-One of the Sulp Niar Pool as she liked to call herself. At first, Lilly was all aloof and distant. She basically refused to acknowledge me for as long as she could, and only it was until I had created such an insane racket inside my own head that Lilly spoke to me, as opposed to of me, for the first time. ((Silence, human!)) I distinctly remember those to be Lilly’s first words to me. ((I am in control of your body now. You are now in the service of the Yeerk Empire, and you will remain quiet while I perform my duties or I will silence you by force!)) Funny how that’s what I remember about Lilly the most and not all of the other things.

Yeah, I know, this doesn’t look good at all for Lilly. But like I said, this was the absolute beginning of our relationship, and even though she now knew every single secret I’ve ever had up to that point, she wasn’t about to do the same for me. Lilly did lay down the ground rules of being a Controller and made it abundantly clear that as long as she was in my head, she was going to be in control of me 24/7. But even at the very start, I could sense something was off with her. Sure, Lilly would accept her orders from her superiors to continue recruiting new members to the Sharing but once we were back out of the Yeerk Pool, she would claim any number of reasons why she couldn’t recruit, and if she did begin recruiting, it wasn’t with any enthusiasm at all. Sort of like she was going through the motions. Lilly didn’t get called out on it because it turned out a lot of the students in my high school batch were also “full members” of the Sharing, enough that Lilly could do what she did unnoticed.

And another thing: although Lilly had made it clear that she could break me and force me into submission any time she wanted, she didn’t, and nor did she really want to. But like I said, she was so distant and aloof at the start. I wouldn’t have minded her being such a slacker, at least in the eyes of the Yeerk Empire, if only she talked to me, even if it was just once a day or so. I tried to get her to talk a few times, but every time she would tell me to shut it or she would have my family forcibly infested. And I would have believed her if Lilly hadn’t been so determined to not recruit anybody into the Sharing. Eventually I did get Lilly to talk, but only after some probing and prodding, and in the end she was just like any other slacker who didn’t want to get told off about her slacking by anyone in authority: she didn’t want a snitch for a host.

((I did not ask to become part of this invasion, Jane,)) Lilly told me. ((I am only trying to survive just as I am sure you are. You should have just said yes during the full membership orientation. And you should consider yourself that I am the Yeerk assigned to you. You have seen how the other Yeerks treat their hosts. If you had been assigned to one of them instead of me then your life would become a living hell, much more than you think it is right now. I have been nice to you, Jane Young. I would appreciate it if you could do the same to me.))

((Nice? You crawl into my head, take control of my whole life, do my homework, kiss my parents goodbye, threaten to infest my whole family, and you call yourself nice!?)) I scoffed. ((You’ve got some nerve for slug!))

((And I am telling you that this situation that you are in right now is the best that you are going to get from the Empire,)) Lilly continued. ((But you know what? I won’t stop you. If you want to inform my superiors about my dereliction of duty upon my next feeding then you are free to do so. You can even request for a new Yeerk at the same time if you want to. Your next Yeerk may treat you better or they may treat you worse. But know that I know many other Yeerks out there who will jump not only at the chance to infest you but also your family, everyone else you know, and anyone who asks you about the Sharing. But if you want to take your chances with one of those Yeerks then you are free to do so. I will not stop you.))

I gave it a good deal of thought, and in the end I didn’t go ahead with my “threat” to tell on Lilly. We remained together for the last two years of the invasion, Lilly still trying to ignore my existence for as long as she could, and then the Yeerks surrendered after the Andalite battle fleet finally arrived. Lilly turned herself over to the authorities, and she was confined to one of the Yeerk Pools on Earth that hadn’t been damaged or destroyed by the fighting between the free humans and the Controller armies. And that was the last that I heard of her, or at least that’s what I thought.

One of the unspoken realities of the aftermath of the Yeerk invasion was that, of the tens of thousands of humans who were finally released from Yeerk control upon the surrender and after it, a lot of them (both involuntary and voluntary Controllers) had been changed irrevocably by the presence of mind-controlling body-snatching alien slugs in their heads. Much of the focus was obviously on the involuntaries as they struggled to return to their pre-invasion lives, but what people didn’t know (or chose to ignore) was that many voluntary Controllers also suffered problems trying to reintegrate into society. Aside from the obvious in which these former voluntaries were identified and singled out (often by former involuntaries who recognized the voluntaries from their journeys to their respective Pools) and often discriminated against, many former voluntary Controllers found that they had problems controlling their own bodies once their Yeerks had been forced out of their heads. This problem wasn’t always suffered by the voluntaries; many involuntaries also had problems moving their bodies after the war. But most of those with control problems were voluntaries, and many of those voluntaries with control problems had let their Yeerks have control of their bodies for the vast majority of the time they were infested. Further studies then revealed that many of the involuntary Controllers who also suffered control problems had been those who gave up the fight during infestation or had been broken by their Yeerks. And the problems seemingly varied from person to person. Some former hosts looked like they were only moving deliberately or in slow motion while others needed help from canes, crutches, wheelchairs, or other people to move around. I had even heard rumors of people who fell into comas or were completely unable to breathe once their Yeerks had left them.

Thankfully I didn’t suffer too many problems myself. Due to my status as a former involuntary Controller, I was afforded months of free physical therapy by the state, and the first few days of my therapy were quite difficult because I could barely lift anything with my arms and I needed a walker to get around. I hadn’t lost too much weight during the invasion; in fact, I think I might have gained a pound or two, but according to the tests that my physical therapists did to me, my mind was acting like I had lost between thirty to forty percent of my muscle mass. According to them, they had only seen that kind of loss on patients with muscular dystrophy or atrophy or whatever they said it was. I was as fit as anybody my age could be but my arms couldn’t lift the same weight and my hands couldn’t grip as strongly; it was as if I had the strength of someone twice or even thrice my age. The physical therapists couldn’t figure out why, and they had nothing to go on except my past as a Controller. Days turned into months, and months turned into years, and yet despite all the training in the world my strength and grip and all the other things the PTs measured remained the same.

Then one day, a study was released which revealed that some scientists had developed a hypothesis which said that Yeerk infestation could possibly help improve the prognosis of those going through post-invasion physical therapy. I know, it sounds crazy. Why in the world would you trust the same thing that had made you lose control of your body to get that control back? I mean, no kidding that it wasn’t a popular study from the moment it was conceived up until it was published, and even when the Yeerk Peace Movement offered to back the study, people still didn’t like the idea. Even today there are those who say that the study was not truly scientific because it had backing from an organization which would stand to profit (not in a monetary sense, of course, but you know what I mean) from the success of said study. And yet here we are.

The study was conducted with two groups of twenty former Controllers each, all drawn from various backgrounds, some involuntary, others involuntary, and others who were voluntary and were host to Peace Movement Yeerks. One group continued on the same therapeutic regimen that they were on before the study, while the other group were allowed to be infested by Yeerks (which had been vetted by the Peace Movement) during their regimens. The groups were then allowed to continue their original treatments for six months, and then after those six months the progress of both groups along their treatments were compared to their therapists’ original prognoses made at the start of the trial period. What the study revealed was that while the first group (the one without Yeerks) had improved right on schedule (with a variance or whatever it’s called of ten percent), the second group (the one with Yeerks) had improved by as much as ninety percent (somewhere around seventy percent was the average that I remember, but I also remember seeing someone who said that the improvement rate was ninety percent).

The release of this study had the effect of reintroducing Yeerks into the public consciousness. We were finally talking about the damned slugs again after collectively deciding years ago that they were a taboo subject. Two sides inevitably formed after the study was released. One side, spearheaded by the Peace Movement but also including Yeerk nothlits and even some former hosts, said that allowing the remaining unmorphed Yeerks to help, heal, and rehabilitate former Controllers was a very big and vital step towards reconciliation between humans and Yeerks. The other side, composed mainly of people who had suffered during their infestations and their relatives but also including some prominent and highly influential people, argued that those former Controllers who needed Yeerk help were too weak, and that no self-respecting human would need help in the form of brain-invading aliens to recover. It was a very intense debate between the two sides, something like the one between pro-life and pro-choice (which I would very much like to avoid discussing at all costs, thank you very much), but back then I didn’t really care. I had had enough of Yeerks to last me a lifetime.

It turned out that that study that had been published was just part one. Part two of the study came out a few months after part one did, and it was about the progress of the study participants after they went back to normal life. The group with Yeerks during their therapy kept their Yeerks while the ones without, well, you get where I’m going. The two groups both went six months with only occasional remedial therapy sessions, and then after the sixth month the groups were tested for their strength once again. This was when the study discovered that the group with the Yeerks had managed to keep the strength they had gained during their initial therapy while the group without Yeerks all suffered some sort of regression (averaging around fifty percent according to the study). This of course only stoked the fires of the debate, and both sides claimed the whole study as proof that they were in the right. The pro-Yeerk side said that this is exactly how humans and Yeerk can reconcile while the pro-human side said that there’s no way that the study could be taken seriously because the Peace Movement had its slimy palps all over it. But the real legacy that this study left was its influence in the decision to legalize voluntary Yeerk infestation in the United States. Well, that and that poor kid who was stoned to death for being a voluntary Controller.

By the time Obama signed the Human-Yeerk Reconciliation Act into law, I had been in and out of physical therapy for over ten years. Sadly, I could see no end in sight for my problems. I had actually improved throughout my therapies; my real problems were that I would have episodes where my hands just can’t grip anything. One moment I would be holding a cup and suddenly the cup would slip out of my hand and fall. It wasn’t just cups though; I would often drop pencils and towels and whatever just happens to be in my hand whenever I suffer an episode. Also, my legs and knees would just buckle for no reason at all. None of my therapists could come up with a solution for any of these problems, and even I was getting desperate. If I wanted to get a job, any job, I couldn’t be dropping things left and right and falling down stairs or tripping over stuff. The healthcare may be free but I’ve got other bills to pay for. And if getting a Yeerk back in my head is going to help pay those bills then so be it.

So I applied for voluntary infestation. I did it online because I was more comfortable doing that. I filled out a questionnaire asking questions such as why I wanted to become a Controller; if I had been a Controller previously; and if I had answered yes to the previous question, for how long was I a Controller; and if I wanted to be in control most of the time or if I was okay with my prospective Yeerk getting much of the time in control. I answered the questionnaire, sent it off, and then I waited for a reply. Finally, after a few weeks I got an email from the Human-Yeerk Alliance (the new name of the Peace Movement that they took after voluntary infestation was legalized) telling me that my application had been accepted, and that I could finalize the process by going to the nearest Pool. The email even told me that I could request a specific Yeerk at the Pool, and they would check if this Yeerk was still available and had not been made to become a nothlit.

Now that got me thinking. I knew that by this point, all of the Yeerks available for infestation had been vetted by the Peace Movement beforehand (there was some discussion about getting Yeerks to breed to increase the supply but the application numbers hadn’t justified increasing their numbers just yet) but I was still not that comfortable with the idea of just any Yeerk coming into my head and seeing what I see, knowing what I know. And then I remembered a name, a designation, and a Pool of birth: Lilken Eight-Six-Two-One of the Sulp Niar Pool. I hadn’t heard of anything about her after she surrendered herself back in 2002. I didn’t know if she had become a nothlit or if she was swimming around in some Pool somewhere. But she was the only Yeerk I really knew, kind of, and better the Yeerk you know than one you don’t, right?

I went to the Pool nearest to where I lived, and as this was just months after infestation was legalized there were still quite a few protests going on in front of the new Pools (or “community centers” as the HYA had dubbed them) where accepted applicants came to finish the process and be infested (or re-infested in the case of former Controllers). The Pool that I went to was one of the smaller locations so the protests there were similarly small, but there was still a crowd picketing at the entrance, jeering at everyone who went in and came out for selling out to the enemy. I remember this lady, maybe somewhere in her fifties, look me in the eye and tell me, “You’ve just sold your soul to the devil, young lady!” I mean, okay, some of the more well-known Yeerks like Esplin Nine-Four-Six-Six (aka Visser Three) were evil and should be called evil, but the one Yeerk I do know kind of personally isn’t that evil. She’s more of a slacker than anything else, but certainly not evil.

I went past the protesters and into the Pool. Some things were still familiar, like the gray light coming from the sludge and the rock-like walls (even though this Pool was now in a ground-level building) but there were some things missing from the Pool that I remembered like the cages for the involuntary hosts. Now that was something that I was glad had not made it into this version of the Yeerk Pool. I went to one of the offices to the side of the Pool, told them my name and my application number, signed the waiver, and then I asked them if Lilten Eight-Six-Two-One of the Sulp Niar Pool was still available. The person in charge of processing the applications told me that they would check, and then lo and behold, a few minutes later they came back and said that not only was Lilten still available for infestation, but she had also been transferred to this very Pool just a few weeks before. Isn’t that something?

I can’t remember for how long I waited. Must have been a few hours at the very least. Finally though, my name was called, and I went into this smaller room with a contraption that looked like a dentist’s chair except with a small tank where the dentist’s tools would have been. A woman was sitting where the dentist would have been while working on your teeth, and she was typing things into a keyboard connected to the small tank. I didn’t recognize the woman but I had a feeling that she was a Controller, like I was about to become. Again. “So, Jane,” she said in a chipper tone as I sat down on the dentist’s chair thingy, “welcome back to the Yeerk Pool. How are you feeling?”

“Nervous,” I admitted. 

“You were involuntary before, right?” the woman continued. “Got your head shoved into the sludge by the Horks, didn’t you? Well, we don’t do that here now.” She laughed at her little joke, but I was not really inclined to share her humor. She seemed very happy about the thought of helping a Yeerk infest someone, too happy for my liking. But I knew that I had to go ahead with this if I wanted to fix myself.

“Anyway, Jane, here’s your Yeerk. Lilten Eight-Six-Two-One of the Sulp Niar Pool, just like you asked for.” She let me look at the monitor mounted on the side of the tank to confirm that it was indeed Lilten in there. Not that I would have recognized her after all these years. Heck, I wouldn’t have even recognized Lilly back during the invasion. I was way too busy tuning out the screams of the other involuntaries to focus on small things like what my Yeerk looked like outside my head. But the screen said that it was Lilten, and I was inclined to believe that.

“Now, I believe you know what to expect next,” the woman told me. “So I’m not going to bore you with it. Just lay your head down, and let me get you strapped in.”

“Strapped in?” I asked. Why in the world would I need to be strapped in if I had agreed to be infested again by my own free will?

“Oh, it’s just protocol, part of the procedure,” the woman waved off. “The first-timers don’t really know about the initial pain so they flinch, and we don’t like the head moving around so we keep the heads strapped in. Just to make it fair, it’s applied to everyone.”

“Okay,” I nodded, still not absolutely sure or convinced of the reasoning. The strap went over my forehead and kept my head from moving around too much. The woman stood up, reached into the tank, and scooped out the Yeerk inside. “One last look to confirm: are you sure you want to go ahead with this? Full-time infestation? No trial period, going all in?”

I nodded, or at least I tried to nod, but the strap obviously prevented me from doing so. “Yes,” I said out loud. “I’m sure. Let’s go ahead. Let’s do it.” Really, I just wanted the procedure to be done and over with so I wouldn’t be able to chicken out at the last second.

“Okay,” the woman nodded back. “Ready? In three, two, one…” I felt something cold and slimy touch my right ear, and I tensed up and drew a sharp breath. I forced myself to look at a dried blob of paint on the ceiling and clenched my fists as a pain began to develop in said ear, and then in an instant the pain was gone. I could still feel something moving around in my ear but not so much the pain. “Steady, steady, easy now,” the woman told me. It sounded weird because I could only hear her through one ear, the one that was facing away from her. And then I felt my right foot relax. I wasn’t even aware that I had been clenching my feet through all this, and now it was relaxed.

Other body parts followed in a random order, like my right knee then my tongue then my left pinky then my left lower eyelid. Eventually it was my whole body that had gone, and my earlier tenseness along with it. I was breathing, I was blinking, but I wasn’t doing any of those things. At least not by myself. And then I heard a voice that I hadn’t heard for over ten years.

((Well, well, well. Jane Young. What a pleasant surprise,)) Lilten Eight-Six-Two-One of the Sulp Niar Pool said to me. ((I was not expecting you to become my new host.))

((Join the club, Lilly,)) I replied. ((I wasn’t expecting to become a Controller again, and yet here we are.))

“Lilten?” the woman called out. “Lilten? Have you made it? Are you connected?”

((Excuse me, Jane, while I tend to my duties once again,)) Lilly said. ((May I?))

((Wow, you actually remembered to ask,)) I nodded internally. ((I’ll have to remember to put that on your evaluation.))

((Very funny, Jane,)) Lilly snorted as she gave me a mental eye roll, and then she took full control and spoke. “Yes, Terliss, Jamie, I am here,” she said. “I am fully connected.”

“Good, good,” Jamie or Terliss or whoever was in control nodded. “Jane, can you hear me? Are you all right?”

((Now it’s your turn,)) Lilly told me, and just like that I was in control of my body once again. “Yeah, I’m here,” I said in reply to Jamie’s question.

“Great!” she said. She then removed the strap around my head, which allowed me to sit up. That was a bit difficult because my neck had suddenly turned a bit stiff. I could still move my head around, but it was a bit hard and painful at the same time. But other than that and the four-inch alien slug now wrapped tightly around my brain, I didn’t feel any different than when I had come in to the Pool. “Everything all right? Everything okay between the two of you?” Jamie or Terliss asked me.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” I replied. “ _We’re_ fine.” It felt weird saying that. I felt weird saying that. But I knew that I would have to get used to it real quick.

“Great,” she said yet again. Did this woman have any other words in her vocabulary? She typed in a few more things on the keyboard and wrote something on a clipboard which she then gave to me to sign. Once I had put my signature on the paper, the woman took the clipboard back and said, “Remember the three-day rule. We all know that Kandrona starvation and the fugue sucks for the Yeerks, but if you don’t take good care of Lilten, things are going to suck for you too, Jane.”

“Yeah, thanks for reminding me,” I replied. As if my life wasn’t already going to suck with Lilly in my head.

((I heard that!)) Lilly cried out.

((No, you didn’t,)) I said back. ((You didn’t hear anything.))

“So, I’m sure you might have seen that we have a few, well, ‘friends’ outside,” Jamie/Terliss said. “So I would understand if you didn’t want to go out the way you came in. That’s all right; there’s an emergency exit out back that you can use if you don’t want to go out front. So, um, thanks,” she said, and the last one caught me by surprise because it sounded like a completely different person saying it.

“Thanks? For what?” I asked.

“For, you know, this,” the woman said, gesturing at everything and nothing with her hands. “Letting a Yeerk back in your head. Not everyone likes it, but if they only knew why some of us choose to do it then maybe they wouldn’t hate us as much.”

I wanted to say that perhaps that’s the reason why the protesters hate us voluntary Controllers so much, because they know exactly why some of us needed the Yeerks back in our heads. But I kept my mouth shut, and instead I just nodded. “You’re welcome,” I said, and then I went on my way.

((What did you mean by that?)) Lilly asked me as I walked to the emergency exit at the back of the Pool. ((That the protesters hate us because they know why some of you would want or need my kind?))

((I would love to tell you all about it, Lilly,)) I said with more than a little sarcasm, ((but we both know it would be quicker if you just see for yourself.))

((Is that permission? Are you giving me permission to look into your memories?))

((Surely you can’t be that stupid, Lilly. Of course it is.))

I stopped in the middle of the hallway because I didn’t want to trip over something while walking at the same time that Lilly was accessing my memories. I watched as Lilly perused the last ten years, and while she didn’t react when she saw what had happened to my hands and legs, I had the impression of someone holding a hand over their mouth in surprise. ((Oh, Jane, I am so sorry,)) Lilly finally managed to say. ((Are you saying that I did this to you?))

((Not just you,)) I replied. ((Your fellow Yeerks did the same thing to thousands of humans like me, and now you’re going to help me get through this.))

((Jane, you should know that I never wanted that to happen to you,)) Lilten said. ((The muscle loss, the tremors, the loss of grip… You should not have gone through that just because of me.))

((Well, I got them just the same, and now you’re going to help me get rid of them,)) I told my Yeerk. As I approached the exit, it was then that I realized that something didn’t seem right. ((Lilly, hang on a minute,)) I said. ((Why are you suddenly a thousand times more talkative now than back then?))

((Oh, that’s simple. Times have changed,)) Lilten replied. ((I am no longer beholden to serve the Yeerk Empire. You’re no longer an involuntary Controller. There is no longer a chance that I will be reassigned to another host or that you will be assigned to another Yeerk. We can now be friends, or at least talk to each other. And isn’t that what you wanted from me in the end?))

I was dumbfounded by what I had just found out. ((You’ve got to be kidding me,)) I finally managed to say. ((You’re kidding me, right? The only reason you didn’t want to talk to me back then was because you didn’t want another Yeerk to find out you had been talking to me?))

((Well, yes, of course,)) Lilly replied with a tone that said that it was the most obvious thing in the world. ((If I had indulged you in a conversation like you wanted back then, and then you were reassigned to another Yeerk and that Yeerk looked through your memories and saw our conversation, they could have reported me for host sympathy. And if that had happened, I wouldn’t be here to help you.))

Unbelievable. Simply unbelievable. The reason why Lilly refused to talk to me back during the invasion was because she didn’t want to get told on by a fellow Yeerk. She really was a slacker through and through.

((You think this is all a joke, Jane?)) Lilly suddenly shouted, and at that moment she sounded like the Yeerk that had invaded my privacy and threatened to infest my whole family. But a moment later and she was back to the new and friendlier Lilly. ((Do you know what the penalty for host sympathy is? Kandrona starvation. A long and drawn-out Kandrona starvation. Visser Eight knows how to make starvation last for months, knows how to make you beg for death, and he won’t let you die until he’s had his fun. That was what was in store for me if I had talked to you about more than just my duties to the Empire. But now… Now, we are both free of that yoke. We are now both free to live as we please.))

I pushed the door of the emergency exit open and stepped out into the open air. I stood outside on the pavement, feeling the sun on my skin and the wind blowing my hair. I watched the cars passing by on the street and stared at the colorful fruits and flowers in the park across the street. I could have sworn that I heard Lilly sigh in satisfaction. ((This is what many Yeerks really want, Jane,)) she told me. ((Not conquering entire planets and species, but just the chance to experience the universe in a body with good senses. Some, like the ones who run the Empire, may like doing that, but the Yeerks I know just want to live without thinking about war again.))

((Yeah, I think I can agree to that,)) I nodded. ((It’s probably why that girl, Jamie, said thank you to me back there.))

((Oh, yes. Terliss had told me all about her host Jamie when I arrived here. She’s a big softie, Jamie. Thinks that all Yeerks deserve to have a willing host, each and every single one of us. Terliss is just happy to be back in her head. Says she prefers Jamie’s company to the others she’s known.))

((Speaking of Terliss and happy, she seemed to really like getting to put you in my ear,)) I said.

((Ah, yes, Terliss definitely enjoys doing the infestations for the applicants,)) Lilly laughed. ((I have a feeling that Jamie encourages Terliss because it makes her happy. It’s either the perfect combination or the worst combination ever to be made.))

((Oh, don’t be so judgmental, Lilly,)) I said as I hailed a cab to take me back home. Ah, if only life could always be like this. Just walking around and looking at stuff for your alien brain slug to appreciate. But if I had known the places and situations that putting Lilly in my head would take me then I probably wouldn’t have let her in there in the first place. Maybe.


	2. Taken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's just another day for Jane and Lilten... or is it?

It had been six years or thereabouts since I went back to the Yeerk Pool to be re-infested by Lilten Eight-Six-Two-One of the Sulp Niar Pool. I can’t believe that much time has already passed. Another thing I couldn’t believe was how quickly I became used to Lilly’s presence the second time around. When she had first infested me, I was acutely aware of her presence since she was in full control of my body and held on to that control tight. But now she held me in something called “loose control”; that is, while she was still connected to every nerve in my body and could everything I felt, I was still the one in control of my body. Kind of a reversal of our roles from back in the day. Now Lilly’s the one who gets to sit back and watch while I go about my daily life. I have to say that I am still quite disturbed by just how easy a Yeerk like Lilly was able to integrate herself into my life once again, and by how quickly I had allowed herself to integrate.

But having Lilly in my head did have its benefits. For one, I got to see for myself the proof of the study that had allowed Lilten to get back in my head in the first place. When I went back to my physical therapist, now once again a Controller, the first thing he tested was my grip strength, and I guess you could say that he was surprised when the results came back and it seemed as if I had gotten back overnight everything that I had lost right after the invasion. He was equally surprised when I revealed what I had over the weekend, namely getting a Yeerk back in my head. He didn’t say too much about it though, just that he didn’t mind what I did so long as it wouldn’t affect my progress through my therapy in a negative way. “Just as long as you keep coming back every thirty days so I can keep track of how you’re going along,” he added.

The tremors, shakes, and loss of grip in my hands also went down massively once Lilly was back in my head. I still had them, but not as much as before I was infested again, and it seemed as if Lilly could feel when an episode was coming because she would take control of the affected part of my body just before the episode would actually happen. If the tremor was about to happen in one of my legs, Lilly would actually tell me to stop walking just as she took control so I wouldn’t end up tripping over the stairs or into the path of car or a bus. Those times were rare, but I was still thankful to Lilly for looking out after me. I knew that she was doing it for her own selfish reasons (she needs my body just to be able to interact with the wider world), but I guess it’s the thought that counts.

I finally managed to finish my original degree after a stint in community college, and I worked a few odd jobs here and there before finally landing an internship in this bank. I won’t tell you the name of the bank because it could provide people with a more definitive identifier for me as well as compromise the identities of others who are, shall we say, in the same boat as I am. Just know that it’s a big and well-known bank. Anyway, I worked my way up in this bank from intern to full-time employee to project manager in the marketing department. Don’t let the title fool you; all I really do is be the girl to whom the ten people under me give their presentations so that I can then pick the best parts and turn those into a presentation that I could then show to the actual heads of the marketing department. It may not be what I had dreamed of doing back when I was a kid but at least my work kept my rent paid and my stomach full.

In my first few years with Lilly back in my head, I let her feed whenever we could spare the time, but once my hours stabilized and eventually became a conventional working day, we both decided that the best plan of action was to let her feed every third night. It meant that Lilly would be in my head during the day and be there to help me out if I ever had an episode during the work day. During those nights that I would drop her off at the Yeerk Pool to feed, we both hoped that any episode that could happen during that time would happen while I was in my apartment. I also had these pills that were usually prescribed to patients who had suffered nerve damage but in my case were more for maintenance than anything else.

And now on to the day where I almost wished that I hadn’t gone and let Lilten infest me once again. This day started off much like any other day, the only difference being that Lilly had been feeding in the Pool overnight while I slept. I didn’t suffer any episodes while I was in the shower or dressing up or fixing myself a quick breakfast. My legs didn’t fail me on the way to the Pool to pick up Lilly, and my knees didn’t buckle when I knelt down on the pier and plunged my ear into the sludge so she could get in. All in all, it had been a great start of the day for me, perhaps the best I’ve had in like, ever.

A few things had changed since that day when I decided to become a Controller again. There were no more protesters outside the Pools, and there hadn’t been since around 2013, I think. Like I said, the Yeerks integrated themselves back into society very quickly, and since the applicants for infestation didn’t look like stopping anytime soon, the protesters had just decided to pack up their things and leave. There had been a brief resurgence in protests around 2015 or 2016 thanks to that whole Nothlit Rights Movement and Nothlit State thing, from the bombing of Flight 6569 to the Victory Day shootings to the thankfully short-lived establishment of the Nothlit State over in Pennsylvania. Man, people did not take lightly to these nothlits creating what is essentially a new beachhead for the Yeerk Empire to restart their invasion of Earth. The National Guard saw to it that the Nothlit State didn’t get any farther than they did, thank God, but it’s safe to say that those nothlits that were part of Eldril One-Eight-Two’s “uprising” or “rebellion” or whatever you wanted to call it undid in a matter of weeks what the Peace Movement had been working to achieve for years: peace and reconciliation between humans and Yeerks. Now I should tell you that Lilten was not a member of the Peace Movement nor did she particularly like them she believes that she may have been approached by a member or two in an attempt to recruit her before she had been assigned to me, and she thought that this would put her on the Empire’s radar. But they had gotten us to the point where humans were actually willing to entertain the thought of maybe understanding why the Yeerks did what they did, and now the Nothlit State had gone and messed all that up.

Once again there was mistrust between humans, Yeerks, and even Andalites, but the Yeerks were the easier and more acceptable targets because of their history of, well, invading us and taking over our bodies. There were demonstrations outside of the nothlit settlements (which might have had the effect of pushing more nothlits to Eldril’s cause) but there also protests outside of the Yeerk Pools, especially the ones here in the LA-SoCal area because people thought that the Human-Yeerk Alliance or whatever it’s called were all just sleeper agents of the Empire waiting for the perfect moment to strike. The leader of the HYA, the former Visser Five, did her best to alleviate everyone’s concerns, even speaking from the battlefront with the Nothlit State and letting her host speak without her as well. But still, even after the Nothlit State had been defeated, it felt like the trust that was just beginning to form between humans and Yeerks had disappeared, and it would once again take years before we could even think about regaining that trust.

There were no people outside the Pool protesting it today, and inside the Pool itself there weren’t a lot of people as well. Some were just dropping off their Yeerks to feed while others like me were picking up theirs after an overnight feeding. Since it was early morning, it only took me five minutes before I got Lilten back in my head. ((Looks like someone’s having a good day,)) she said once she had completed her connections.

((I know,)) I replied. ((Not a single episode since last night. I honestly can’t remember the last time I didn’t have an episode for that long.))

((Congratulations, Jane,)) Lilly said. ((It really looks like you’re finally making progress.))

((Yeah,)) I nodded. ((I really hope this continues and gets better. You know what though? I think this calls for a celebration. What do you say to some hot chocolate with hazelnut? My treat!))

((Oh, Jane, you know me. I never turn down an offer of hot chocolate with hazelnut!)) Lilly then sent me a mental image of a smiley face licking its lips. I laughed at the image and made my way out of the Pool and towards a café that was along the way to my office. However, as soon as we set foot on the pavement outside of the Pool, Lilten turned all serious and said, ((Jane, I think someone is following us.))

((Really?)) I asked. ((What does he look like?))

((Latino, short and stocky,)) Lilly replied. ((He’s wearing a suit without a tie.))

((Oh, him,)) I said. ((Yeah, I’ve seen him before. ((I bumped into him on the way to the Pool. I think he even called me “worm-brain” when I did that.)) “Worm-brain” was one of the milder slurs for Controllers used by those on the anti-infestation side.

((Well, do watch out for him,)) Lilly warned me. ((I don’t like the looks of him.))

((Okay.)) The street I was walking down on had a row of shops with lots of windows, which enabled me to keep an eye on the man following me out of the corner of my eye. I reached into my purse and took out my phone, but at the same time I took hold of the can of mace that I carried with me at all times. I started carrying mace ever since a friend of mine had used it to stop herself from getting sexually assaulted. I also began walking briskly since the café was just up the street and I hoped that moving towards a crowd would dissuade the man from whatever plans he may have for me.

The café couldn’t have appeared before me quickly enough. I immediately ducked inside and moved as far back inside as I could to watch where the man was going to go. But instead of following me inside the café, he just continued straight ahead, not even bothering to glance where I had gone. But only when he was finally out of sight did I breathe a sigh of relief. ((Okay, that was very close,)) I said. ((Too close for comfort.))

((Yeah,)) Lilten agreed. ((But I was sure that he was following us as soon as we came out of the Pool. I don’t know,)) she said, sending me a mental image of shoulders being shrugged. ((Maybe I’m just being paranoid.))

((Join the club,)) I said. ((But you can never be too sure. Not after another Controller got kidnapped again.))

In recent weeks, there had been a strange and inexplicable series of kidnappings going on around the city. The only link that the police could come up between the kidnappings was that all of those taken were Controllers. Two had been Controllers from the invasion while the other three were only infested after legalization. The authorities could determine no motive from the kidnappings, and the kidnappers didn’t send any sort of demands to the families or even the cops. It’s like these Controllers had been taken and then they all vanished from the face of the Earth. Everyone’s wondering where the Controllers and their abductors had gone, everyone from the talk shows to the radio to the podcasts and even the guys in the Pool. Especially the guys in the Pool. It’s about the only topic being talked about by those who were waiting for their Yeerks to feed. They, _we’re_ the ones apparently in most danger of being taken, after all.

Like I said, it was all very strange.

((Well, enough of that now,)) Lilly said. ((Let’s go get that hot chocolate with hazelnut. I really want to drink some hot chocolate right now.))

((Yeah, same,)) I nodded. I queued up, made my order, and then I sat down while I waited for my name to be called so I could pick up my drink and also catch my breath. The thought of that man following me around had made me nervous, and one of the side effects of my nervousness was that it made me want to pee. I looked around, took a few deep breaths and crossed my legs, but the call of nature became too great and I had to stand up to go to the ladies’ room. Or at least I would have gone there if my journey hadn’t been so rudely interrupted by the man from before suddenly laying his hand on my shoulder and calling out, “Hey, Jane.”

I screamed once I felt the hand touch my shoulder. I was pretty sure that I jumped as high as the ceiling as well. In an instant, the mace was in my hand and pointed at the man’s face. “Whoa, whoa, whoa!” he said. “Not the face, please! Anything but the face!”

“Who the hell are you and why have you been following me!?” I demanded to know.

“Don’t you remember me?” he asked back. “It’s me, Marco!”

I blinked, and my hold on the mace wavered. The man did seem oddly familiar, but I had thought that that was only because I had seen him the night that I had dropped off Lilten. But now that I had a much better look at him (albeit while he was staring down the nozzle of my mace), the face and the memory finally clicked. “Oh, right,” I said slowly. “Marco. Yeah.”

“Is everything okay, ma’am?” a thin and scrawny man wearing a red apron who looked like he was barely out of college asked as he walked up to the hallway leading to the restrooms. I quickly hid my mace from view and shook my head. “No, no, it’s okay,” I said. “My friend just surprised me, that’s all.”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s no problem,” Marco added. “Sorry about that. I didn’t want to make a fuss.”

The man didn’t look like he was completely convinced by our explanations, but he decided to let it rest. “Okay, but just watch yourselves, okay?” he said, and then he walked away.

“Oh, my God, Marco, don’t do that again, please!” I said once the other man was out of earshot. “You almost made me pee myself!”

“I’m sorry about that, Jane. I just couldn’t find a better moment. But I do need to talk to you.”

“Yeah, well, can it wait? I really need to go. You better be grateful that I haven’t left a puddle on the floor right here. Now if you’ll excuse me…” I went into the restroom and did my business, and then I went out again to find Marco still waiting. “So, can we talk now?” he asked.

“Sure,” I said as we walked over to an empty table and sat down.

I looked carefully at the man seated in front of me. Marco Navarra, aka the one and only Marco the Animorph. So much had changed about him and yet so little had changed as well. He still had that look of mischievous charm in his eyes, but look beyond that and you can see the mind of a cold and ruthless logician who surely kept the Animorphs alive and fighting in the later years of the invasion. I actually went to the same school that the Animorphs did back in the day, but of course I never suspected any of them of trying to fight an alien invasion even as I became a puppet of said invasion myself. And I actually got a mention in one of those _Animorphs_ books, the ones that came out in the early 2000s and claimed to tell the story of their fight against the Yeerks. You know the ones. So apparently some of those books were actually based on the truth because Marco had admitted to me personally that I was the girl whom he had asked Tobias to spy on in, if I remember correctly, the book where the Animorphs ended up in the North Pole. Or Alaska. Definitely somewhere in the Arctic because they mentioned seals and polar bears and Inuits. Or was it Eskimos? Obviously I wasn’t in the Sharing back then; I’d heard of them but I hadn’t even thought of joining them back then.

And when I did become part of the Sharing and had Lilten in my head, Marco’s paths and mine crossed again in one of the Animorphs’ missions which weren’t included in the “official” books. The Animorphs had crashed a Sharing picnic in the Gardens where the Sharing had been trying to recruit new members, and in the chaos Lilten got tripped up and we found ourselves staring at a gorilla approaching us. I remember hearing a voice, not Lilten’s but a distinctly male one, speaking in my head. ((Go on! Get out of here!)) the voice said to me. And Lilten was more than willing to follow its advice. Only after the war did I find out that the gorilla was Marco, and that he had told me that because he had recognized me and wanted me to get away from the Sharing, not knowing that I was already a full member by that time. I found out about all this when Marco had gone on this publicity tour for his autobiography and I (along with a few other Sharing members who had been injured in Animorphs raids over the years) had been invited onstage could make a public apology. He sounded sincere enough in his apology even though he said that he was only attacking us because he couldn’t get through to the Yeerks in our heads. But that had been back before infestation had been legalized. Now I had a Yeerk in my head once again, and I had no idea how he would react to that.

“Marco Navarra,” I said. “It’s been a long time since I last saw you. How are you? How’s life been treating you?”

“I’m fine, more or less, I guess,” Marco replied. “Listen, Jane, before we get to anything else, I just want to apologize for scaring you like that. I wasn’t sure that it was you when I saw you, and then I wasn’t sure how to approach you.”

“Oh, so you _were_ the one following me,” I said, more as a statement than a question. “Honestly, I thought you were somebody else when I saw you.”

“I could say the same about you,” Marco nodded. “If I hadn’t seen you come out of your apartment, I would have thought you were some actress shooting a film or a TV series.”

“Really?” I muttered as I tucked my hair behind my ears. “I mean, I know I try to look good every day but I don’t think anyone’s ever confused me for an actress before.” As I spoke, I felt my cheeks flush, and I soon realized that I was blushing.

((Oh my gosh, Jane, is this really happening?)) Lilly said teasingly. ((Are you blushing because of Marco the Animorph?))

((Shut up, Lilly! You’re just making it worse!)) I retorted as I hurriedly picked up my phone and pretended to read a text so that Marco wouldn’t see my face.

((By the Kandrona, Jane! Your brain waves are going absolutely mental! I can’t believe this! You’ve got a crush on Marco Navarra!)) Lilly then began to cackle like an old crooked warty witch brewing a potion in a massive cauldron like in the old cartoons. I tried to shut out Lilly’s laughing and focused back on Marco. “You’re not looking too shabby yourself,” I told him. “And please don’t take this the wrong way but I don’t think Michael Peña really did you justice. Just my opinion though, you know. Just saying.”

“Michael Peña? Oh, yeah, now I remember,” Marco nodded. “The SNL sketch. Yeah, that one was a bit hit and miss. Kinda like SNL as a whole now. But I really think Danai Gurira nailed Cassie perfectly. You know, Cassie the lover of all things living, but oh! Wait a minute! You’re a threat to everything that I love! I’m going to kill you now! Yup, that’s our Cassie, all right.”

I laughed at Marco’s joke, laughed quite harder than I really should have. I didn’t know why. It was probably just the nerves I had about Marco potentially finding out that I now have a Yeerk in my head.

((Don’t kid yourself, Jane,)) Lilten said knowingly. ((You and I both know that it’s not really because of me that you’re nervous around him. Just ask him out on a date already!))

((Oh, shut up! And already? We’ve only just met again and already you want me to ask him out on a date?))

((Why not? I can feel everything in your body, Jane. Your mind says no but your heart says yes. Just go for it already, will you?)) Lilten then had the audacity to giggle like a teenager after saying that.

“So, um, I, uh, wanna say sorry again,” Marco said after the awkward silence that followed our laughter from his earlier joke about Cassie.

“Sorry? For what?” I asked.

“For calling you worm-brain,” he replied. “I really didn’t recognize you at first when you were walking to the Pool. I thought you were just another Controller come to drop off or pick up one of them slugs. So, what’s it with you then? Did you just apply or have you already got one?”

Well, there it is. Right for the jugular. Well, Marco did pride himself in his ability to go from Point A all the way to Point Z. Might as well get this over with and out of the way. “Yeah, I’ve already got a Yeerk,” I replied. “She’s right here with us right now. Yeah, funny story about my Yeerk. She was actually the one who was assigned to me when I got in too deep with the Sharing. In fact, she was the only one assigned to me throughout the war. And I wouldn’t even have let her back into my head if it hadn’t been for these episodes I’ve been having with tremors in my legs and suddenly losing my grip with mugs and pencils and things. I read about the study, thought I might give it a try. And so far I’ve been having less and less episodes.”

“She, huh?” Marco asked while nodding quietly. “Was it Peace Movement? Your Yeerk, I mean.”

“Yeah, not really,” I replied. “Lilly said that she was sure that some Peace Movement Yeerks had approached her while she was still in the Pool waiting new assignment and she had refused because she didn’t want to get involved in things that could get her executed by the Empire. But as far as I know, she’s not Peace Movement.”

“Ah, I see,” Marco said. “Well, that’s nice to hear. That you’re finally getting some progress with your condition, I mean. So how does this work for you? Do you share control with the thing? Are you in control most of the time or is it? Am I even talking to Jane right now or are you a Yeerk?”

“No, no, Marco, don’t worry,” I said. “This is me. This is Jane. Lilly isn’t in control, not really. She’s doing this thing called ‘loose control’ where she’s just got enough connections to feel everything that I can feel, but I’m the one doing the heavy lifting like moving and breathing and speaking to you right now.”

Lilten laughed in my head again. ((I love how you leave it open that there is the possibility that I could just take control of you anytime I wanted and he wouldn’t know the difference,)) she said. ((But I have to say that I don’t really like his attitude, especially about me.))

((Can you blame him, though?)) I asked. ((He and his family have been through a lot thanks to you Yeerks. If I were in his shoes I’d feel the same way about you.))

“So how’s your Yeerk been treating you? Well, I hope,” Marco asked.

“Oh, come on, Marco,” I muttered. “You know that there’s no longer any way for a Yeerk to mistreat their host these days. The hosting system has got enough checks and balances in it to teach the three branches of government a lesson.”

“Well, you can’t really blame me for asking,” Marco said. “I don’t know about you but I’ve seen the darker side of our gray ‘friends’. You know my mother was the host to Visser One. I don’t know for how long Visser One infested my mom but all that time under Edriss’s control, watching the things that that worm did for the Empire, it messed her up real bad. She may not look like it but she’s still struggling with all the memories and the images. Why do you think she speaks so passionately about the subject during her speeches?

“And Nora, my stepmom,” Marco continued, “she got infested near the end. After the Yeerks failed to infest Dad they went to her to find out everything he might have told her. Nora fought back with all her might, but that’s exactly why the Yeerks broke her. After they surrendered, I sought out Nora, and then I made sure that the slug in her head came really, really close to starvation. And when it went crawled out of her head I watched as it squirmed on the ground before I finally put it out of its misery. But that wasn’t the end of it though. Far from it, actually. I don’t know what the Yeerks did to Nora, but she never was the same after the war. She tried to kill herself, Jane,” he said lowly and through gritted teeth, and I could see a tear forming in the corner of his eye.

“Nora tried to kill herself, not once but twice,” Marco went on. “I got to her in time to stop her the first time around, but she almost succeeded the second time. Dad and I got Nora to the hospital in time after her second attempt, but after that we all decided that it was in her best interests if Nora was committed until she finally recovers. If she ever recovers,” he added bitterly. “So forgive me if I don’t really trust the slippery fuckers. Forgive me for thinking you’re crazy to let one of those slugs into your head because I’ve seen first-hand the effects their fellows have had on two of my family members. I’ve always been against infestation, even if it’s voluntary, but now that it’s legal there’s nothing I can do about it. So don’t expect me to applaud you or whatever for your choices.”

((Okay, now that last one was completely uncalled for,)) Lilten said. ((You never said anything about him applauding you for your choice, did you?))

I ignored her. Instead, I looked Marco in the eye and said, “Look, I understand where you’re coming from. I really do. My experiences during the invasion may not have been quite like what your mom experienced but I’ve still seen the horrors of the Pool, the experiences of people with bad Yeerks. In fact, if there was a way that I could have fixed myself without having to get Lilten or any other Yeerk in my head, I would have done it. But hey, this is the hand I’ve been dealt. And you’re of course entitled to your own opinion like everyone else. I didn’t expect you to say anything else about me when you found out about the… thing in my head.” I then went silent as I tried to find the next words to say. Eventually, I managed to ask, “So Eva had problems with her arms and legs as well?”

Marco nodded his head. “She does her best to hide it, does what she can,” he said. “On good days, and lately they’ve been becoming rarer, she can walk around unaided. She’s a bit slow, sure, but still unaided. On the really bad days…” he trailed off, looking teary-eyed into the distance, and I chose not the press the matter.

“Oh, Marco, I am so sorry,” I muttered, and I reached out to touch his hands, which were clasped before his knees. When my fingers touched his, he immediately tried to draw them away, and he looked at me with those eyes that said so much, eyes that said “don’t you dare pity me” while also revealing the pain and turmoil beneath the surface. He then hesitated pulling away, and soon I was holding his right hand in mine.

“Order for Miss Jean,” the barista called out. “Hot chocolate for Miss Jean.”

Marco and I immediately looked away from each other. I looked down at my pinstriped slacks and tried to brush off some lint, and then I picked up my receipt and said to Marco, “Excuse me.” He nodded his head in understanding and continued looking outside. But just as I was about to claim my hot chocolate from the barista, I heard footsteps behind me, and soon Marco was beside me. He was now wearing sunglasses, which struck me as odd. I’d always hated people who wore sunglasses indoors. “Excuse me, but can I talk to the manager?” he asked.

A portly Indian woman appeared behind the counter. “I’m the manager,” she said. “May I help you? Is there any problem at all?” she asked.

Marco reached into his suit and took out a wallet. I had the briefest glimpse of an official-looking badge when he flashed it at the manager. “Agent Rich Nashville, FBI,” he introduced himself. “This establishment is now part of a sting operation to take down the group responsible for the recent spate of kidnappings in the city. We have reason to believe that the group is going to strike in this location next so I’d like you to ask your customers to move away from the windows as soon as possible, but if we can, let’s avoid a panic. So let’s go.” At the same time, two or three more people in black suits entered the café and began moving the patrons away from the large glass windows at the front and towards the back. Another agent walked up to the counter and asked, not that politely, for the barista and manager to follow him.

“Yeah, Jane, that means you too,” Marco told me as he removed his sunglasses and escorted me away.

((Hey! My hot chocolate!)) Lilten demanded. ((With hazelnuts!))

“Marco, I still hadn’t got my drink yet,” I said.

“We’ll get you your drink later, after all this, I promise,” Marco replied. “On me.”

((I’ll hold him to that,)) Lilly declared.

“Marco, what the fuck is going on?” I asked.

“You heard what I said,” he replied. “We have reason to believe that the group responsible for all the kidnappings has been casing this place for a good while now and now they’re ready to make their move.”

“Wait, who’s ‘we’? Is it the feds? Is it the Animorphs? Who is it? And why did you say you’re FBI when you’re clearly not? And who are they after now?”

“I can’t really answer those questions, Jane, not yet,” Marco shook his head. “Except the last one. We’re ninety percent sure that _you_ are their next target.”

I felt like a huge lump of lead had just been dropped into my stomach. “Me? The next target? Why?” I asked. “What could they want from me? Why would they want to take _me_?”

“We don’t know, Jane,” Marco said, shaking his head again. “We just don’t know. _I_ don’t know. But we’re not going to let them take you. _I’m_ not going to let them take you. Got that?”

I looked Marco in the eye, and there I saw the truth of his words, and because of that I nodded. Inside my head, Lilten cooed. ((Aww, isn’t that sweet?)) she asked. ((He’s not perfect, sure, but for a knight in shining armor, I’d take him any day if I was you!))

((Will you just shut up!?)) I said furiously even as I blushed again. ((Now is not the time for this, Lilten!))

Lilten laughed at my confusion. And then she turned deadly serious and said, ((Argh! What’s that tinny little _filshig_ annoying noise?))

((What noise?)) I asked back. Then I heard it, this noise that sounded like the feedback on a microphone that starts off barely audible except maybe for dogs and then gets louder and louder until it’s truly unbearable. Except in this case, when the noise had built up to the painful phase the café’s windows shattered into millions of tiny little pieces. I instinctively covered my face as the shock wave sent the glass my way, and I felt lots of small cuts on my arms. The shock wave also slammed me against the wall and pain radiated all over my back and hips.

I heard shouting somewhere just outside the café, and I moved my hands away to see two men covered in black from head to toe jumping into the café through the broken windows. In their hands they carried—

((Dracon beams,)) Lilten gasped.

“There!” one of the men shouted while pointing at me. I braced myself for the worst, braced myself for a Dracon beam burning through my chest or for hands to grab my arms and literally drag me out into the street across all that glass. But before any of them could make their move, I heard sirens blaring down the street, and the men looked at each other. It looked like they hadn’t been expecting the arrival of the cops so quickly this time around. And right on cue, someone shouted on a megaphone, “This is the LAPD! Drop your weapons and put your hands in the air! Don’t try to fight your way out of this one; you’re surrounded! Hey, don’t you dare think about it! Don’t you do it! Don’t do—”

TSEEEEEWWWW!!!

It was the unmistakable sound of a Dracon beam being fired. This was inevitably followed by a barrage of gunfire from the cops outside of the café, and judging by the sounds of some of the guns it would seem as if SWAT was also there. This street had just turned into a battlefield.

The two men inside the café looked around for a moment, unsure of what to do next, and then they decided that going after me was more worth their time than going out there to fight the cops. And then out of nowhere came a roar, a sound so primal that the hairs on the back of my neck stood up, and for a brief moment I was back in the Gardens cowering in fear because that was exactly how Lilten had also felt back then.

And there he was, the gorilla standing tall inside the café. The two men turned around to face this more immediate threat but before they could get a shot off, the gorilla had punched the first man and sent him straight to his companion, and both of them dropped their Dracon beams. The gorilla smashed his fists into the ground and crushed the Dracons, and then he went over to pick up the second man and bashed him against the wall. The gorilla didn’t say anything but the man shouted, “I’m not telling you anything, Animorph.”

The gorilla’s momentary pause was the opening that the man needed. He whistled, loud enough that he could have hailed a cab all the way from New York, and three Hork-Bajir jumped out of the white van outside the café and pointed Dracons at the gorilla. The gorilla roared and then he backhanded the Hork-Bajir nearest to him while still holding on to the man. Both Hork and human flew straight into the side of the van, and then the gorilla turned his attention to the other Hork-Bajir. The second one pointed his Dracon at the gorilla’s face, but the gorilla snorted and grabbed the Dracon with both hands. ((Who brings a Dracon beam to a fistfight?)) Marco proclaimed in public thoughtspeak, then he punched the Hork in the face and threw him away.

The third Hork-Bajir, the one with blue bands across his biceps and forearms, ducked before his fellow could hit him and faced the gorilla. “Not bad, Marrrrrco Navarrrrrrra,” he said, rasping and rolling through the Rs. “You may haffffff beaten my felllllllowssssss, but you will neverrrrrr defeat me!” the Hork proclaimed as he rubbed his wrist blades against each other.

((Oh, buddy, do I have bad news for you,)) Marco said. ((I see no harm in trying just that!))

Both gorilla and Hork-Bajir roared as they charged towards each other. It was a surreal sight; it had to be: a man who could turn into a gorilla (among other animals) and an alien covered heard to tail in sharp blades grappling with each other inside a trashed city café while gunshots and Dracon beams went off just outside. All those were words and phrases that I never thought I would ever say together in the same sentence. It was all so strange.

Before, Marco had been able to just punch his way through his opponents, but this blue-banded Hork-Bajir was proving to be more than a match for him. Not only could the Hork go toe-to-toe with Marco in his gorilla morph, but the Hork-Bajir was also able to land a few blows of his own. Soon, the Hork-Bajir was landing hit after hit on Marco and then, surprisingly, the Hork-Bajir jumped, grabbed hold of Marco and body-slammed him into the floor. The gorilla let out a muffled scream of pain, and at that moment I locked eyes with him. There was a moment when everything suddenly slowed down, and all the gunfire and shouting outside went quiet, and all I heard was Marco’s voice saying, ((Go! Jane, go!))

I finally picked myself back up and ran towards the back of the café. Or at least it could have been me. Maybe it was Lilten finally taking to take control and save both our skins. What I did know for sure was that I had barely made it five steps before I felt something hit my back and my entire body collapsed on me. I could feel my muscles convulsing of their own will, and neither Lilly nor I could do anything to stop them.

((Lilly, what the hell is happening to me?)) I asked even as I drew in short and ragged breaths.

((It’s a stun beam,)) Lilly finally managed to reply after a few seconds’ pause. ((We’ve been stunned!))

((What!? What do you mean, stunned?)) I tried to move around, to see which body parts hadn’t been affected by the stun beam that Lilly said that I’d been hit by, but I quickly determined that all of my limbs (arms and legs, hands and feet) were gone. I could move my eyes around, but it did little good as I was lying flat on my stomach on the ground. I felt more than heard heavy footsteps making their way towards me, accompanied by the scraping of claws against the linoleum-covered floor. Then I felt something grab my right foot and begin to drag me across the floor. _No, no, no,_ I tried to cry out, but my mouth refused to cooperate. I tried to kick out, to flail about, but my arms and legs remained unresponsive.

I was then flipped onto my back, and as my head lolled around I glimpsed a mass of black fur curled up in the corner. It was Marco, either unconscious or stunned just like me. Then I was lifted up across the threshold and then dragged once again along the pavement before finally being thrown into a van. Inside the van was another man wearing sunglasses, and this man examined me and then jabbed a needle into my neck. As soon as the needle pierced the skin, my eyes rolled up into my head and everything turned black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, feel free to leave a review or a comment if you want me to know what you think of the story! – GR


	3. The One Where I Meet a New "Old" Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jen Carson and Yemra 640 have gone back to normal life. Or at least they're trying to. Then Jen meets a friend from back in college, but what does her arrival mean for our girl and her Yeerk?

My name is Jen.

I could just say that my name is Jen and leave it at that. That’s how a lot of people with the same stories as I have introduced themselves. They’ve got their reasons for keeping their real identities on the down low, and I’m not going to rip into them for that. I am, however, going to go against the trend and declare that my full name is Jennifer Yelena Carson. You can look me up on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram if you want. No guarantees that I’ll add you or follow back though. I’m the Jennifer Yelena Carson from Pennsylvania, the one who graduated from Notre and is a fan of all things Fighting Irish. I’m the Jennifer Yelena Carson who loves to watch and play soccer and is a fan of Arsenal FC of the English Premier League.

I’m also the Jennifer Yelena Carson with the Yeerk in her hand, on her head, and in her head. Yes, that’s right. I’m Jennifer Carson the Controller. I’m the Jennifer Carson who let this alien slug from light-years away crawl into my head, live there for the next twenty-plus years, and basically give her the ability to take control of my every single move. Not that Yemra elects to use this ability all the time; only sometimes, and more often than not it’s me who has to ask her to take over when I don’t want to deal with life’s shit

Oh, and I have also been both a refugee and a war veteran.

Okay, maybe that last bit was a bit of an exaggeration, but I have definitely been an internally displaced person, to use the acceptable new terms. Remember all that brouhaha about a Nothlit State that had popped up somewhere in the middle of Pennsylvania sometime between the black president and the orange president? Yep, I was right in the middle of it, along with my Yeerk, my family, and at least a third of the population of the city where the Nothlit State decided to set up shop. We were all told to evacuate to nearby Fort Indiantown Gap while the police and the National Guard dealt with the Nothlit State, and that is how I qualify to be an internally displaced person.

Then, during the evacuation, I was recruited into an army of Controllers formed by a high-ranking member of the Human-Yeerk Alliance who suspected that the Nothlit State was actually the cover for something more sinister. This high-ranking member’s theory turned out to be correct, because we found out that the Nothlit State was supposed to be the advance party for the Yeerk Empire’s second attempt at invading Earth. Intel that we had collected indicated that the war between the Yeerks and Andalites was not going so well for the Yeerks, which was why the Yeerks had decided to go for another shot at this planet which was home to over seven billion potential hosts and soldiers for the war. And to them, there was something poetic about stealing away what the Andalites thought to be their greatest victory over the Yeerks yet.

Anyway, long story short, this “army” of Controllers was forced to evacuate by the National Guard, but during our exfil my unit was ambushed and I was captured. The nothlits first tried to starve Yemra out of my head, but that failed because for some reason, Yemra can survive without Kandrona rays for thirty days, ten times longer than the Yeerk time limit that we are all familiar with. The nothlits then tried to extract the reason why by means of mental torture, and during those sessions they took tissue samples from Yemra so they could determine why she was the way she was. Reports from the Nothlit State base captured at the end of their “rebellion” or “insurrection” or whatever people want to call it seem to indicate that it’s some sort of mutation in Yems’ genetic code, but we’ll get to that later.

I was finally rescued from captivity by a nothlit who was also the HYA’s contact from deep within the Nothlit State. We were then helped in our escape by a former human-Controller who had been swayed to the Nothlit State’s side by the promise of a new Yeerk in her head but was eventually persuaded that the Yeerk that she would get the second time around would be in no way, shape or form as nice as her old Yeerk. Sadly, the nothlit woman who helped me escape sacrificed herself to buy me and the other woman time to get the hell out of Dodge, and then a sniper shot the former Controller, forcing me to make my way back to friendly forces on my own. I hate to reduce the story of both Charegh Two-Zero-Zero and Amanda Barzaglio to a single sentence like that but for the moment it has to be done. I’ll get back to the both of them further down the line.

The part about me being a war veteran comes from the time after Charegh and Amanda’s deaths and before I finally made it to a National Guard checkpoint. I crossed paths with a Nothlit State patrol specifically searching for me, and to this day I have little if any explanation for the events that followed. All I know is that I had decided to fight those three nothlits and, after a lengthy shootout that also included my being almost choked to death by a former Yeerk Visser, I somehow ended up killing all three nothlits. Hardly Medal of Honor stuff, I know, but Trump still gave me a Presidential Citizens Medal, which is like the second-highest civilian honor an American can get, for it. And I also wrote a book about what happened, which got some circulation (but most definitely did not become _New York Times_ bestseller), and now I’m hearing talk about a movie adaptation starring Scarlett Johansson or Brie Larson or whoever. Personally I think that’s all bunk because neither me nor my publisher have been contacted about it, and I think that that’s how it works.

Anyway, all that happened two or three years ago. The police are still getting calls from people about possible Noesh hiding out in the sticks after the Nothlit State itself was defeated by the National Guard, even though I have it on very good authority that any high-ranking survivors from Noesh are hiding out among the stars, possibly back in Yeerk Empire territory. The people living out in the suburbs of the city, my family being part of them, were allowed to come back just a few weeks after the National Guard had declared that they had eradicated the last pocket of Noesh resistance. Slowly, people filtered back into the city itself until only those places where most of the fighting had occurred, a place called the “Red Zone”, remained uninhabited. The old Yeerk Pool beside the college, which the nothlits had used as their headquarters for the duration of their “rebellion”, had been abandoned; the Kandrona generator and Pool itself moved to a suburb on the other side of the interstate from my place. The state government had promised to rebuild the Red Zone ASAP, but three years on the empty and partially collapsed husks of the buildings damaged during the fighting still remain. You can still see the bullet holes on the walls in the Red Zone, a stark contrast to the areas outside the Red Zone which had been rebuilt mostly privately but supposedly with state and federal compensations, where you can’t even tell that an urban battle had occurred.

The city may have been rebuilt, but I don’t think I can say the same for myself. The thing about my having been both a refugee and a veteran is that I’ve seen things and done things that can really mess up the mind if you’re not ready to handle it. I wasn’t too affected by our evacuation to the Gap; to be honest I had decided to look at it as a very extended camping trip. Not so much when I had been captured by the nothlits. Remember that mental torture stuff that I said that they made me go through? I would have preferred if they had just beaten me up physically, because scars, bruises, even broken bones heal. But memories last forever. Even if they’re buried underneath years and years of other memories, the nothlits had this beam or ray that they just point at you and every single happy and sad memory you’ve ever had will be replayed over and over again until the ray is turned off. Maybe a few months after the Nothlit State was defeated, I started having recurring dreams and nightmares of the scenes that that ray had played out in my mind. Soon the content of my dreams shifted to imaginary scenarios, scenes where I would get shot by a sniper or receive a chest-full of lead from a patrolling nothlit or, the worst of them all, the nothlits physically extracting Yemra from inside my skull. If you’ve read my first book then you already know how I feel about the thought of being separated from my Yeerk. If you haven’t then there. Now you know.

As I was saying, the nightmares began to take a toll on my daily life. I started to sleep less because I didn’t want to have the same nightmares over and over again, and that had the effect of making me more tired and sleepy during the day. And in between manning the register at Mr. Tenkiss’s diner, interning in that trucking company, and soccer on Thursdays and the weekends; that just wouldn’t do. So I finally decided to get some counseling. It was a tough process; I think I bounced around a few counselors or so before I finally settled on someone I felt comfortable with, meaning someone whom I didn’t really hesitate to open up with.

There was also a problem with these counseling sessions as it relates to Yemra. Technically speaking, Yemra is a separate entity from me, Jen Carson, so there is all manner of doctor-patient confidentiality agreements that had to be talked about. Yems and I eventually came to an arrangement wherein I would put Yems in some water where she would wait while I had my counseling session, and then once that was over I would put her back in my head. That way, technically speaking, there was only me and my counselor present during the sessions. My counselor tried not to think too much about the fact that Yemra would be able to know everything I said and did during every session due to her unique nature; he said that if he did that, he would be the one to need counseling.

And then one day, while on my way back home from yet another session, Yemra surprised me when she spoke up and said that she wanted to talk to a counselor as well. ((You know, I just thought that it would be a good idea,)) she said once I had gotten over my initial shock and asked her why she wanted to do it. ((I’ve seen the effects talking to someone else about your thoughts has had on you. I’ve felt your burdens ease, even for just a tiny bit, after you’ve finally had someone to talk to about the things you’ve been thinking about. And, to be honest, your emotions and thoughts have bled off on me, you know what I mean? I’m right where your thoughts originate. I see every single one as they’re formed. You can’t expect me not to be affected by everything that passes through your mind. I’m not that kind of Yeerk.))

((Why didn’t you say so before? Why didn’t you say anything while I was looking for a counselor?)) I retorted. ((And why don’t you want to talk to me?)) I asked. ((You know you can say anything to me,)) I added, not bothering to keep the hurt out of my tone.

((No, Jen, you don’t understand,)) Yemra replied soothingly with an added mental hug. ((This has nothing to do with you at all. No, actually, it does, but not in the way you think. You’re finally getting to sort out your issues, Jennifer. There’s no need for me to trouble you with mine. Let me deal with my problems my way while you deal with yours.))

I was prepared to fight with Yems about how she definitely could have talked to me about her problems, but as always her mind was set, and I couldn’t talk her out of it. But if I thought that finding a counselor for me was hard enough, then finding one for Yemra was a completely different matter altogether. First of all, there are no Yeerk counselors out there (by which I mean Yeerks who are also counselors to other Yeerks). Second, the human counselors we approached, while they were very much understanding of Yemra’s plight, there was simply no handbook out there on how to counsel a Yeerk, and because I couldn’t be present during Yemra’s sessions for the same confidentiality reasons that I can’t have Yems in my head during _my_ sessions she had to go into the counselor’s head if she wanted to talk to them. And that opens up a new can of worms because Yemra might end up accessing the counselor’s memories of other sessions with other patients. That’s the problem with Yeerks connecting to a new brain; they don’t have a clue where they could end up connecting first.

A solution came in the unlikely form of Yibey Nine-One-Five, Yemra’s boss from back during the war. We had gone to the new Yeerk Pool in town for one of Yemra’s monthly feedings (she may not need Kandrona rays every three days but she still needs them) and, while swimming around in the Pool, happened to bump into Yibey, who was also feeding that time. One thing led to another, and eventually Yems ended up telling Yibey everything. After that, when she had returned to my head, her mental voice sounded strangely raw, as if she had just cried a lot, if Yeerks could even cry at all. ((Hey, Yems, what happened?)) I asked her. ((What happened with you and Yibey?))

((Everything,)) was her reply. ((I told Yibey everything. Everything I wanted to say, everything I wanted to make known, everything.))

((Um, well, okay,)) I stammered. ((I mean, that’s a good thing, right? You finally got all these things off your chest, so to speak.))

((Yeah, I guess,)) Yemra conceded, giving out a mental shrug. ((I just wasn’t expecting to tell everything to Yibey, of all people.))

((You mean all the Yeerks,)) I added, and that seemed to lift up Yemra’s spirits, even if just a little bit. ((So what did you tell him?))

((Oh, Jen, I’m not sure you want to know all about this,)) Yemra hesitated.

((Oh, come on, Yems,)) I sighed. ((It’s not like I’m asking you to give me a memory dump. I don’t need to know every single detail. I just want you to tell me what you said to Yibey and what you did. I mean, it only seems fair. You already know everything about me, even the parts that I would rather you didn’t. You get to see everything I’ve told my counselor when you get back. Can’t you at least do the same for me? Sounds like a fair trade to me.))

Yemra went silent for a minute. She was definitely thinking about it. Finally, after what had felt like an eternity, she replied. ((All right, Jen. I’ll do it. For you,)) she said. ((Are you ready?))

((Give it to me, Yems. Give me your best shot.))

((Here goes…)) At first, it didn’t feel like anything was happening, but then I heard Yemra speaking. I thought she was talking to me but then I realized that she wasn’t speaking in any language that I understood. She had to be speaking in Yeerkish, and soon after I heard Yibey speaking, also in Yeerkish. Then came the flood of images, scattered and confused but, once you’ve seen the whole thing, they all told the story of how Yemra had felt completely powerless, even inside my body. She had felt helpless because she felt that there were a lot of things she could have done differently, like help carry Charegh during our escape from the Pool or tell Amanda to keep her head down or even make me walk away from my confrontation with Immib and his patrol. Yemra had never realized just how angry she was that she had been born a Yeerk, that even with a host body she was still never that far away from danger. All the battles she’d had to endure, the realization that maybe it wasn’t right to force the Hork-Bajir (or any of the Empire’s other host species, for that matter) to fight these battles even with Yeerks in their heads, the decision to join the Peace Movement and hopefully create a paradigm shift in the Empire where other Yeerks realize that war and conquest isn’t the only way forward. No wonder Yemra had enjoyed the transition to a human host. Then she could believe, even for just a brief moment, that there was no invasion, no war, no involuntary hosts, just peaceful coexistence between humans and Yeerks.

By the end of the memory, tears were falling from my eyes as well. ((Oh, my God,)) I said. ((I never knew… You never said anything, Yems. Why didn’t you tell me any of this?)) I asked with more than a hint of anger creeping into my voice.

((I’ve already answered that question, Jen,)) Yemra replied simply. ((You already have enough problems by yourself as it is. I didn’t want to add my troubles to yours.))

After all this difficulty, Yemra and I finally settled into a rhythm following our respective counseling sessions. I would take Yemra out of my head before meeting my counselor and let her back in afterwards to view my memories, and then when it was her turn to talk to Yibey they would go soak up Kandrona rays in Yibey’s portable Pool (rank hath its privileges and all that, after all) and then she would dump to me her memories of the conversation raw and uncut. It seemed only fair that I got to know some of what Yemra does recently when she can literally access any memory of mine anytime, anywhere. Sure, it may leave me bawling like a baby whenever Yemra gives me her memories, but I feel that it’s worth it.

To be completely honest, going through counseling was almost as hard as living through everything all over again. But the experience was also quite relieving; cathartic, even. And while my sessions with my counselor and Yemra’s talks with Yibey left us both emotionally drained and exhausted at the end, we both felt a little bit lighter each time, like we were both finally managing to lift our respective burdens bit by bit.

Still, it was also hard for us to recover from these sessions and talks, pouring out our thoughts, feelings, and recollections to someone else. My latest session with my counselor had been quite taxing because I was once again having nightmares about being taunted by Charegh and Amanda’s ghosts before getting shot by Immib. By the end, I was crying again and saying again and again that I never wanted either of them to die, and that if I could have done anything to save both of them I would have done it already. It was a classic case of survivor’s guilt, and I had a feeling that Yemra’s memories and her own unresolved guilt about what happened had triggered a recurrence of my nightmares.

I definitely needed a pick-me-up after my session. Yemra started things off by wrapping me in a mental embrace; I sank into the warmth of her hug like I would my comforter and blanket on a cold day. Since in that state I was in no position to move, let alone walk around, Yems would take control and walk me to the bus stop, and she would then ask me where I wanted to go. ((I heard that there’s a new second-hand bookshop that opened right beside the café just a few days ago,)) I replied. ((I wanna go check it out, see what’s in there.))

((Sure thing, Jen,)) Yemra replied with a smile, and then we boarded the bus headed for downtown. The café and the new bookstore was a few blocks away from the downtown bus stop, but I didn’t mind the walk. The air helped to clear my head after all. I walked into the bookstore first, and I perused the available titles as I walked along the aisles. There were quite a few paperbacks on display, but none that really interested me, and the titles that I was looking for weren’t there. So then I bent down to look at the lower shelves (this is where I’ve found some of the cheaper books I’ve bought over the years, wink wink). I skimmed through the spines and covers but still nothing caught my attention. ((I don’t know about this, Jen,)) Yemra said. ((Maybe this isn’t your lucky day.))

I clicked my tongue and sighed. ((Dang it,)) I muttered. ((I was really hoping to get a new book today.))

((Don’t worry about it. Maybe next time you’ll find a book you like.))

((Yeah, sure.)) I was just about to walk out of the bookshop when I noticed this book with a colorful cover lying on top of a pile beside the cashier which I could only describe as unsorted. I picked up the book and read the title: _Little Brown Brothers: The Truth about the Relationship between Humanity and Andalites_. The cover itself was drawn like a political cartoon from the late 19th century or early 20th century. It was a tropical scene depicting an Andalite wearing an Uncle Sam costume and a human wearing a loose white shirt. The human was dragging his knuckles along the ground like a monkey while the Andalite had one hand pointing up at the sky and the other holding a scroll with the words “Agreement of Mutual Benefit”. ((Ooh, now this is interesting,)) Yemra said as she examined the cover. ((I wonder what it’s about,)) she muttered.

((The truth about the relationship between humanity and Andalites, duh,)) I retorted, and then I turned the book over to read the summary at the back.

_On December 23, 2004, humanity, as one single and united species, signed the Treaty of Understanding, Friendship, and Cooperation with the Andalites, our first ever treaty with a species from another planet. This was supposed to be the next chapter in the story of mankind, with the Andalites playing the role of humanity’s mentor and guide to the stars and beyond. But more than a decade after the signing of this historic treaty, there is not much understanding, few friendships, and little to no cooperation at all between the two species. Andalites have revealed little about their cultures and traditions, they treat us more as feudal subjects than trusted allies, and what little help they have given us have all sorts of terms and conditions attached to them. In this book, author Arthur Dexter Macalinao examines the complicated and oftentimes tense relationship between man and Andalite and compares it with the postcolonial dealings of the second half of the 20th century in the hopes of answering the following questions: what do humans and Andalites think of each other? Are humans truly benefitting under the protection of the Andalites? Or would humanity have been better off without the Andalites?_

((Oh, wow,)) Yemra muttered once we had finished reading the summary. ((Why do I get the feeling that this guy doesn’t like the Andalites at all?))

((I don’t know, Yems,)) I replied. ((Maybe it’s just you.)) I then skimmed through the book to get an idea of what it was really about (the summary doesn’t always give you the full picture) and it was basically comparing human-Andalite relations with America’s dealings with its former colonies and territories like Cuba and the Philippines. It wasn’t the kind of book that I normally read, and I kind of disagreed with the main point that the author was making (that humanity would have been better off without the Andalites) but still, the book was intriguing. I bought the thing for four dollars, expensive for second-hand standards but a bargain when compared to its list price in one of the brand-name bookstores. I like to think that I got a steal.

With new book in hand, I made my way towards the café across the street and ordered an iced chocolate frappe, a chocolate glazed donut, and a slice of triple chocolate cake. What can I say? I really like chocolate. Plus, it’s scientifically proven that chocolate produces endorphins, the stuff that makes people feel happy and good about themselves. Yeah, never mind that my family has a history of getting diabetes; when I see chocolate, I’m gonna eat it.

I picked up my order, with the barista somehow misspelling my simple three-letter, one-syllable name into something I almost couldn’t understand (seriously though, how does one turn Jen into Joann or something like that anyway? I swear, sometimes I feel that baristas do this on purpose.) and then I made my way to an empty table and laid down my frappe, donut, and cake slice. Someone had left behind a newspaper on the table I had taken so I tossed it aside and sat down. I flipped through my phone just to make sure I hadn’t missed anything, and then for a change I decided to get back the paper and read through it. According to the news, the reconstruction in the city was proceeding right on schedule, and it was also a few million dollars under budget. ((Well, isn’t that something?)) Yemra noted. ((Is the government finally doing something right after all?))

((I wouldn’t put too much stock into this one, Yems,)) I replied. ((It’s an election year, after all. It’s anyone’s guess when after the election people are gonna talk about the delays and the budget overruns.))

((That’s quite pessimistic of you, isn’t it?)) Yems quipped. ((Me, I prefer to see the goodness in everyone.))

((Easy for you to say,)) I muttered. ((Given the chance, you can and will see the goodness in anyone, if they let you into their head.))

Yemra laughed. ((Ah, that _is_ true,)) she conceded. I then flipped through the rest of the paper, stopping for the world news, the celebrity gossip pages, and the comic strips. Once I was finished, I set the paper aside and took a sip of my frappe. I already knew what this frappe was going to taste like, having ordered this drink maybe a hundred times or more already, but I was still happily amazed by the sheer pleasure emanating from Yemra every time she savors the chocolate and whipped cream on my tongue. I cannot even begin to imagine what Kandrona rays taste like, if it even tastes like anything at all, but thanks to me Yemra now knows the taste of an iced choco frappe, a greasy and dripping Philly cheese steak, the pasta al dente and pizza margherita from Ristorante Russolini, and all the other things I’ve put in my mouth. Okay, maybe I could have worded that last sentence better. All the other food I’ve ever eaten, that’s what I really meant.

Suddenly, I felt this weird tingling sensation throughout my body, kind of like that pins and needles feeling you get when your leg falls asleep then wakes up. I knew exactly what this feeling entailed, but I still waited for Yemra to give me official confirmation. ((Heads up, Jen,)) she said. ((Someone who’s either a Controller or used to be one just went into the café.))

I nodded imperceptibly, and then I took out my phone again and pretended to check my feed while in reality, I was scanning the faces of everyone who was coming into the café or had just gone inside. I recognized a few people from the Yeerk Pool, but none of them were setting off the _nik’iili_ in my blood like this mystery Controller. I then looked down the line of people making their orders but still nothing. And then the answer to my question quite literally walked right in front of me.

“Jen! Is that you?” a girl with big brown eyes and long brown hair framing her round face asked me suddenly. The girl looked very familiar, like I should have already remembered who she was, but at the moment I couldn’t put a finger on her name.

“It’s Olga!” she said. “Remember? Olga Beauregard? From Notre Dame? We were both on the soccer team!”

And then it finally clicked. “Oh! Olga!” I exclaimed, and I stood up and we embraced. “You didn’t tell me you were here in town!” I said, but more as a question.

“Yeah, well, this was a bit last minute, I’d say,” Olga replied with a sheepish laugh.

“Well, don’t just stand there! Sit, sit!” I said, and Olga took the seat opposite me. “You want something to eat?” I asked. “I’ve got a donut and a cake, if you like.”

“Oh, no thanks,” Olga shook her head. “I’ve actually been, you know, watching my carbs,” she said, saying the last part in a whisper that I could barely hear. Not that I could blame her. Olga had always been on the curvy side of things ever since I first met her, or as my male friends would say, she’s a thicc girl. I mean, I’ve low-key envied Olga’s hips and rear. She’s got the kind of figure that boys think about in the middle of the night. Me, I’ve often heard that my hips could be used as a ruler if needed, and no amount of squats in the world had made a bubble butt out of my pancake ass.

“So, what brings you here to my hometown?” I asked Olga. I was genuinely interested to know about that, but I also hoped that I would be able to use that to work a mention about Yeerks into our conversation because, I’m telling you, the _nik’iili_ is going haywire and Yemra is going ballistic inside my head. You’ve never known suffering until you’ve had a Yeerk in your head screaming ((It’s her!)) over and over again and pretending nothing’s happening on the outside. This must be what the majority of Yeerks (well, the ones whose hosts really fought back) must have been experiencing back in the invasion.

“Yeah, that’s a pretty funny story, actually,” Olga shrugged. “Well, first of all, I didn’t even know your hometown had a soccer team, so when I was called over by the manager to meet with these two folks and said that they wanted to sign me for the team here, I’m just like ‘what?’ Did _you_ know that there was a soccer team in town?”

“Yeah, I’ve heard about it,” I replied. “In fact, I’d more than heard about it. I actually play for that club.”

“No way! Really?” Olga asked. She laughed at the amazing coincidence that she had stumbled upon and said, “Looks like we’re gonna be teammates again. Isn’t that cool? It’s gonna be just like college!”

I laughed as I watched Olga’s eyes light up. I’d always liked that about her, how she finds the joy and pleasure in the little things in life. I used to be like that, but now I’m not sure about what happened, or what changed in me. Maybe I’ve grown older quicker than I thought. Maybe it’s because I’ve seen things someone my age shouldn’t have seen. I don’t know.

“Oh, and speaking of college,” Olga added, “remember that conversation that we had a few days before your graduation?”

“What conversation?” I asked back.

“You know,” Olga trailed off. “The one about, you know… this?” She pointed up at the sky with her finger. Or maybe it was her head. In any case, Yemra got the hint quicker than I did. ((Oh, snap,)) she told me. ((Here it comes.))

“Yeah, Jen, remember that conversation?” Olga continued. “The one where I wanted to know everything there is to know about… Yeerks?” She said that last word in a whisper I could barely hear.

“Yeah, okay, what about it?” I asked her even though I already knew what the answer was going to be.

“Well, I finally did it. I went ahead and got myself a Yeerk,” Olga said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, reviews and comments are appreciated. Thanks! – GR


	4. The One Where We Talk About Soccer

I blinked twice rapidly. Olga’s words took their sweet time to get through my thick skull. “Say what now?” I asked.

“I finally did it. I got myself a Yeerk,” Olga repeated.

“Oh, well, good for you!” I said, really for lack of anything else to say.

((I knew it,)) Yemra said with her own self-satisfied smirk. ((I told you she was a Controller!))

I blinked once again, more to clear my head than anything. Olga Deborah Beauregard, Miss Thunder Thighs herself, was a Controller? Now even I wasn’t expecting that. There was nothing in Olga’s looks and overall demeanor that would suggest that she had allowed an alien brain slug to squirm into her head. She still looked very much like the happy-go-lucky girl from Alabama that I remembered her to be. Then again, that is the thing with us Controllers. Nothing we do would even remotely suggest the presence of the aliens wrapped around our brains. Except for telling you that there is an alien worm wrapped around my brain, of course. I thought we’d already covered that. Heck, Controllers can’t even tell other Controllers from regular people; the only reason why I felt Olga’s Yeerk’s presence in the first place was because of the _nik’iili_ in my blood, and I’m not sure that that’s a standard feature of Yeerk infestation.

“Her name is Sobboh Eight-One-Two of the Ras Zamant Pool,” Olga continued. “Her previous host is actually the Hork-Bajir that made news a few years ago for joining the Army. What was his name again? Sean Curry or something like it? And wasn’t there something about you meeting him or the other way around before too?”

“It’s Shal Guree,” I corrected her. “Calling him Sean Curry makes him sound like he’s Steph and Seth’s long-lost brother. And now I’m wondering how a Hork can play basketball. Anyway, he’s a nice fellow, Shal Guree. Decent guy. Cool under pressure. Right at absolute zero under fire. Unfortunately I met him in the part of my life that I’d really rather not talk about.”

“Oh, yeah, right,” Olga nodded sheepishly. “You were here when it happened, right?” she asked. And then she smacked her forehead. “Of course! You just said you didn’t want to talk about it!” Olga said, as much to herself as to me. “Why would I even ask you that question? I should really shut up now, maybe talk about something else. How about this neck pain though?” she asked. “You never said anything about getting neck pains once I got my Yeerk.”

“I did say something about neck pain,” I retorted. Honestly, I was a little glad that she had shifted the conversation to something else. “Maybe you weren’t listening or paying attention like always. But trust me, sister, I don’t like the neck pain one bit either.”

“Good God,” Olga muttered as she moved her head around in an attempt to relieve the pain. “And you actually played like this? How could you even play soccer like this? That, and the fact that I really felt my head grow bigger and heavier as soon as Sobboh went in. Surely you must be feeling that too. Man, I can’t even imagine playing a single minute of soccer feeling like this, let alone score some goals. And headers! You scored some fucking headers like this, didn’t you? I’m sure you did! I can only imagine how you must have felt during that. God, my neck and head hurts just thinking about it!”

“Well, as they say, no pain, no gain,” I replied. “Oh, and yeah, it’s just as painful as you think it is. But you’ll get used to the bloated head feeling. That’s the good news. The bad news is that the neck pain is forever.”

“Seriously? No joke?” Olga asked.

“No joke,” I nodded. “I heard that it’s got something to do with how the Yeerk wraps itself around the brain and inflames the meninges which causes the stiff neck-like feeling. Not all Yeerks though. They say that some Yeerks squeeze into the corpus callosum and stay where throughout the three days. Looks like your Yeerk likes to wrap instead of squeezing. So get used to stiff necks for the rest of your life, or for however long you want to host Sobboh, you said her name was?”

“Oh, great,” Olga muttered, rolling her eyes and throwing her arms up theatrically. “It isn’t too late to give back my Yeerk to the Pool, right?” she asked with a laugh. “Of course I’m kidding, Sobboh!” she added immediately as she looked up at her forehead. And I knew she was. Olga had been absolutely and genuinely interested in the idea of becoming a voluntary Controller even way back in college when she had first asked me about it. She had wanted to know everything there is to know about Yeerks, the process of applying for a Yeerk, everything that happens during the first infestation (I know that the HYA didn’t like to use the term infestation these days, but honestly no one has thought up of anything better to describe what happens) and how to continue living normally as a Controller. She read the pamphlets I had given her and even attended an HYA meeting. In fact, Olga was so obsessed with the idea of hosting her own Yeerk that I was sure that had she been around during the Yeerk invasion, she would have joined the Sharing and become a voluntary Controller. Part of me even wondered if she would have agreed to host a nasty Yeerk like Esplin Nine-Four-Six-Six or something of his ilk.

((I highly doubt that possibility ever coming to pass, Jen,)) Yemra replied to my rhetorical question. ((Only Yeerks with good records, meaning those who don’t have a history of breaking their hosts mentally, are allowed to be hosted by voluntary hosts. Ensures that the voluntaries stay voluntary, you know. The Empire may have wanted to take over entire species instead of share bodies but they know the value of voluntary hosts.))

((So you mean to say that, in a twisted sort of way, the Yeerk Empire and the Peace Movement actually have more in common than they think?)) I asked.

((Yes, probably,)) Yemra nodded. ((Actually, maybe, not so much. I don’t know. No.))

((Well, what is it, girl? You’re confusing me!)) I cried out.

((Hey! Olga is talking!)) Yems said in reply.

“Really, I swear that you never said anything about stiff necks and bloated heads while we were talking about this,” Olga muttered.

“And I swear that it was one of the first things I mentioned,” I replied. “Anyway, that’s then. Now you know the feeling, whether you like it or not. So, what are you doing in town? You said something about signing for the soccer team here, right?”

“Yeah, about that,” Olga said, and she leaned back on her chair and sighed. “Okay, so get this. I’ve been hopping around jobs and internships back in Wichita, always trying to make it work but never really settling down in one place or another. I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me. Anyway, we also have a soccer team there, the Skylarks. Semi-pro outfit; our best player gets fifty bucks flat, and everyone after her gets less. And there I was, thinking surely there must be something out there that I really wanted to do that gets me money at the same time. Do you have any idea how expensive even a small apartment costs in Wichita nowadays? Then suddenly, one day, out of the blue, the manager calls me to his office, says that there’s two people who wanna meet me. So I meet with these guys, out in the open near where the other girls are training because you can never be too sure, and—I kid you not—the first thing these guys say to me is ‘How would you like the chance to play in the NWSL?’”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, hang on a minute,” I said, raising up a hand to stop Olga. “The NWSL? Are we still talking about the same team here? Because the last time I looked, our team is nowhere near the NWSL?” The NWSL, or National Women’s Soccer League, is the highest level of women’s soccer in the United States. Kind of like the WNBA except it’s for soccer and there’s always fewer teams in the league than the previous season.

“You didn’t let me finish,” Olga countered. “As I was saying, these two guys asked me if I wanted the chance to play in the NWSL. I said, ‘Are you fucking kidding me? Of course I wanna play in the NWSL!’ Then one of the guys, he had a British accent and chest hair sticking out through his shirt—god, that was fucking gross, but I couldn’t stop staring at it just because it was so gross—clarified things. ‘What we mean to say,’” Olga said, deepening her voice and putting on her best attempt at a British accent, “‘is that we’re offering you the chance to play in the NWSL in the next few years. Our club is not yet playing in the NWSL right now, but we are putting together a team that we hope the NWSL will notice because we plan on bidding for one of the expansion slots the league is offering up for the next decade.’

“That was the first guy,” Olga continued. “The second guy, the one who looks like Neil Patrick Harris’s doppelganger, and I do mean doppelganger because he’s like an exact copy of Neil Patrick Harris, says something along the lines of ‘what I said earlier is still technically the truth because I am literally giving you’—meaning me—‘a chance to play in the NWSL, even if it’s some time away and our expansion bid may not pan out.’ Plus a bunch of other stuff I can’t really remember right now. No, Sobboh, I don’t want to recall it right now.”

Now it was my turn to laugh. Well, not really laugh, more like snigger, because what Olga had just described was so typical of our manager and our boss. “The British guy is our manager, Mitchell Davidson,” I explained to Olga. “Coach Mitch for short. And the Neil Patrick Harris clone is Justin McCormick. He owns the team as well as a number of other teams throughout the state. Well, technically, the Diamonds are the only team he really owns; he’s just a stakeholder in the other teams. But Mr. McCormick has got his fingers in a lot of pies, maybe even try to turn the Rust Belt back into the Steel Belt. Starting with Pennsylvania, of course. Anyway, so you mean to say that both Coach Mitch and Mr. McCormick went to Wichita to come talk to you about joining the team?”

“I mean, if your Coach Mitch and Barney Stimson 2.0 and my guys are one and the same, then sure?” Olga shrugged.

“Good God, Olga, you have no idea what that means,” I said. “That means that both Coach Mitch and Mr. McCormick agreed that signing you would improve our team. And Coach and Mr. McCormick almost never agree on anything. All because Mr. McCormick’s sister ran off to marry Coach Mitch… But I’m sure you don’t want to hear about your new coach—our coach’s private life.”

“Oh, come on, Jen, you’re such a tease!” Olga protested. “You can’t just leave me hanging like that! You gotta tell me more!”

I laughed again. “Good to see that getting a Yeerk still hasn’t stopped you from being such a nosy gossip,” I said. “Look, I don’t know what Mr. McCormick has said to you during his contract pitch, but Coach Mitch knows his stuff. He’s no Pep Guardiola or Jurgen Klopp, and he’ll be the first to admit that, but Coach has won a few trophies throughout his career. He won the women’s league title in Scotland and a double in Portugal and then, as fate would have it, the Diamonds board thought that Coach Mitch would be a great fit for the team after they had sacked the previous manager. Mr. McCormick didn’t want Mitch anywhere near his team because of his sister running off and basically cutting herself off just so she could marry Coach, but the board vetoed Mr. McCormick—I think that’s what they did anyway—and those two guys have been gritting their teeth even as we’ve won the division, then the conference, and finally went all the way to the final. We lost that game, but that’s another story.”

“Man,” Olga muttered, shaking her head as she digested my words. “This all sounds like something you’d see on Netflix when you’re done binging on everything else worth binging on.”

“Hey, don’t give them any ideas,” I said. “They’re already making documentaries about teams like Manchester City and Sunderland. Imagine if Netflix got their hands on the drama of lower league women’s soccer here in the States. Or was that Amazon Prime? I don’t even know anymore; I can’t catch up with all these streaming sites.”

“Aw, come on, it’s not all bad,” Olga said in encouragement. “You’re not _that_ old yet, aren’t you?”

“Well, I’m definitely much closer to thirty than I would have liked,” I muttered. ‘But hey, at least we all grow old, right? Growing _up_ is another matter, of course, but you know what I’m talking about.”

Olga shrugged and nodded in acknowledgement. We both then went silent for a moment, and then Olga asked me, “So you’re playing for the Diamonds too, huh?” she asked. “You a starter for them?”

“What do you think?” I replied. “And it’s not just the money, you know. I don’t mean to big myself up, but if there’s another striker out there who’s better than me but is willing to take a hell of a paycut and is able to gel into our system, I haven’t seen her yet.”

((But you did end up bigging yourself up with that statement, Jen,)) Yemra quipped.

((I don’t remember asking _you_ about anything,)) I snapped back.

“So where would I fit into your system?” Olga asked.

“I don’t know, really,” I thought. “Maybe something like what we did back in college; you know, me being the main striker and you supporting me, maybe even playing as a false nine. But, I’m telling you right now, you’re gonna have a hell of a hard time trying to dislodge Carina from this starting eleven.”

“Oh, really?” Olga asked with a sly grin. “Have you never thought about the possibility that you could be the girl that I replace in the starting eleven come the new season?”

“Oh, so it’s gonna be like that now?” I asked mock-angrily. “Remind me again who scored more goals in four seasons between the two of us?”

“Okay, sure, you may have scored more than me,” Olga retorted, “but at least I didn’t miss three sitters and the first penalty in that shootout in the semifinals in junior year! If it weren’t for me scoring my penalty and Steph saving two of theirs we wouldn’t have made it to the final that year!”

“In my defense, that was not my best penalty kick ever,” I said. “Wilma actually had a better finish than me back then! Freaking Wilma! A goddamn center back! All right, but enough about the past. Let’s talk about the here and now. Have you got yourself a place to stay in town?”

Now there was a look of what appeared to be embarrassment on Olga’s face. “Actually, I was thinking that maybe I could ask you about that,” she finally said after a few moments of awkward silence.

“Whatcha talking about?”

“I just got here from Wichita,” Olga explained. “Like, I literally just got off the bus right now. Well, that’s not really true. I dropped off Sobboh for a quick feeding before I got here. Anyway, as I was saying, your Coach Mitch and Mr. McCormick, while they gave me a big fat contract that I just had to sign if I didn’t want to rot on Wichita’s bench, they never said anything about me getting new digs. Not even a measly freaking room for rent!”

“How much did you say you were gonna get paid again?” I asked.

“Ooh, I don’t think I’m supposed to tell you anything about that,” Olga said guardedly.

“Not even a ballpark figure? Because I’ve got a few ideas, but unless I know how much you’re getting, I can’t recommend anything to you because they might be way out of your price range.”

Olga still seemed unsure about answering that particular question though. “Can’t you suggest anything that’s really, you know, dirt cheap?” she asked.

“Well, if you’re talking about dirt cheap then I know some places up in downtown, but that’s only because it’s right next to the rebuilding areas,” I replied. “Are you sure you wanna wake up to drills and wrecking balls?”

“When you phrase it that way...” Olga trailed off. She certainly didn’t look the type to stay in such an area if she could avoid it.

“Look, the bottom line is that the club doesn’t have any arrangements for lodgings for the non-local players,” I explained. “No matter how much you or I are getting paid, everybody’s got to find their own place without help from the club. They’re just tight-fisted that way. Well, either that or they can stay with a teammate.”

Olga’s ears perked up at that last sentence. “Are you offering to let me stay at your place, Jen?” she asked.

“Don’t get too excited just yet,” I warned her. “I’ll still have to clear this with my parents—”

“You still live with your parents?” Olga sniggered.

“Hey, not everybody can just strike out and make money while doing whatever they like,” I retorted. “Anyway, as I was saying, I’ll have to clear this with my parents before we can go ahead. There’s a guest bedroom at our house that we don’t really use because we don’t really have many guests coming over. I’m thinking you could stay there for the meantime while you look for a place of your own.”

“And if your parents say that I can have your room?” Olga asked teasingly.

“Oh, no way in hell is that going to happen,” I replied immediately. “And even if it does, I’m kicking you out myself. But seriously, you probably can stay with us for the meantime, but you really should start looking for a place to stay. I know that you _can_ stay with us; it’s just a matter of how long.”

“Oh, no, please,” Olga said, seriously this time. “I wouldn’t want to impose on you and your parents.”

“No, no, it’s okay, really,” I insisted. “Just remember to avoid the inner city and anywhere near the park. I mean, I love my city and all that but there are just some places here that a young and single twenty-something girl like you shouldn’t be seen going anywhere near. I’m just looking out for you, girl.”

“Thank you, Jen,” Olga said. “You didn’t have to.”

“Hey, what are friends for, right?” I asked with a laugh. Then I looked down at my phone as I heard it vibrating on the table, telling me that I had a message. I read the message and said, “Oh, crap. Almost forgot.”

“What? You almost forgot what?” Olga asked me.

“We’ve actually got a team meeting scheduled this afternoon,” I told her. “It’s this thing that we do before the start of the season where we go over what we did right and wrong the previous season and anything we could do to make sure we keep doing the right things and avoid doing the wrong things. Looks like you’re in luck again, Deborah,” I said. “You’ve got someone to hitch a ride with to our meeting place.”

“Oh, you’re too kind, Jen,” Olga said. “I don’t even know how I’m going to repay you.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that,” I told her. “I’m just trying to help out a fellow human being.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one took a little bit longer. I’ve been busy with other things. But now here it is, and I do appreciate your thoughts about my work. It only takes a minute or two to leave a review or a comment. Once again, thanks for reading! – GR


	5. Interrogated

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane and Lilten awaken to find themselves in the clutches of a mysterious captor with an unknown objective.

**_Jane_ **

I gasped for air as soon as I regained consciousness. I took many deep breaths, trying to remember exactly what had happened and how I had ended up in this situation in the first place. I remember being paralyzed. I don’t know why I was paralyzed or why I would have been paralyzed, but I was paralyzed nevertheless. And there was also something about a talking gorilla. Gorillas couldn’t talk; they shouldn’t be able to talk. So what was this talking gorilla doing here? And why is he named Marco? I had so many questions…

I lifted up my head so I could rest my neck and moved my arms to get the blood flowing again. Or at least I tried moving my arms, but something stopped them. I looked down, and that was when I noticed these two metallic square things wrapped around my wrists. They appeared to be magnetically attached to the chair on which I had woken up, and they must have very strong magnets because no amount of force on my part could even dislodge these square blocks from the armrests.

I then looked down at my feet and saw more of the same, two metal blocks around my ankles securing them to the chair’s feet. Now fear was beginning to not only replace my confusion but overwhelm it. Where am I? What am I doing here? Why am I here? Why have I been tied up like a hostage?

((Lilly? Lilly! Lilly!)) I called out in my mind. I couldn’t believe that the Yeerk wrapped around my brain was going to be my last remaining link to normality, or at least something resembling it, in my current situation. If Lilly was still in my head after all this, then at least I had somebody to commiserate with me. If not, well… I guess I’m screwed.

((Not just yet, Jane,)) Lilten Eight-Six-Two-One of the Sulp Niar Pool replied. ((I’m still here. You’re not about to go crazy just yet.))

((Well, that’s a relief,)) I snorted sarcastically. Just my luck. I already needed this damn slug to maintain my body’s functionality (which, I may add, she took away in the first place) and now she could very well be the only thing keeping me from losing my sanity.

((Well, now you’re stuck with me whether you like it or not,)) Lilly retorted. ((If we’re going to survive this, we might as well start working together!))

Again, more proof why I couldn’t live with Lilten and why I couldn’t live without her as well. ((Damn it, worm. You’re right,)) I said. ((Now what do we do?))

((Ah, yes, about that,)) Lilten mused. ((For that, I do _not_ have an answer.))

I looked around the place, hoping against hope that maybe somewhere I would be able to find a clue as to where I was. I was in a room with walls made of red rock. The lines were straight, but there was something distinctly… Yeerkish about the construction of the room. This room looked like something that wouldn’t be out of place in a Yeerk Pool. So was I in a Yeerk Pool? I couldn’t be though; all Pools in America were under the control of both the Human-Yeerk Alliance and state governments. Or was it the federal government itself? Anyway, my point is that if I was indeed in a Yeerk Pool, then that Pool (and by extension me) could not be anywhere in America because there is no way that the people responsible for the Controller abductions would be able to get away with it if they were keeping their captives in a Pool in the States.

So where else could I be then? There had been talk of establishing other Pools in Europe, with the UK, France, and Spain among the prime candidates. Apparently there was some progress on the part of the Brits, but no Pools had yet been excavated. Unless someone had already dug up a Pool and had “neglected” to mention it in a report. Yeah, that’s how I imagine corruption to work.

But the red rock didn’t appear British, at least to my uncultured American eyes. Maybe Africa, or South America? Or maybe Australia? Wasn’t there a story about the Animorphs getting stuck in the outback and having to fight off the Yeerks from taking over an Aborigine tribe?

((Well, if we are anywhere in those places then we cannot expect any sort of rescue to come in the foreseeable future,)) Lilten muttered. ((I just hope that these people remember what they’re dealing with.))

((Oh, yeah, right,)) I muttered, nodding along mentally. ((Well, there’s only two ways that this could go: these people either have a Pool and a Kandrona generator handy, or they’re going to starve you out.))

((Oh, please, not starvation,)) Lilly groaned, her mental voice trembling ever so slightly. ((Jane, if these people do intend to starve me then I want you to make me a promise.))

((Okay, I don’t know about this,)) I replied hesitantly. ((But what did you have in mind?))

((If these people end up trying to starve me out, promise me that you will step on me before I go through the fugue.))

((I mean, I don’t know if I can even if I tried,)) I said honestly. ((My legs are tied up after all. And that’s also if you can make it out of my head in time. But okay. If I can crush you before you fugue out then I’ll do it.))

((Thank you, Jane,)) Lilly said. ((No, seriously. I remember a time in the past when you would have been perfectly happy to let me starve and fugue out.))

((I just don’t want your soul pestering mine in the afterlife. If there is an afterlife,)) I added. Now I’m not categorically saying that there is or isn’t an afterlife, but I do know that none of us will ever really know the answer to that particular question.

((Well,)) Lilten said after an awkward silence had descended upon the both of us. ((This conversation turned a little… interesting, wouldn’t you say?))

((I don’t know,)) I shrugged mentally. ((Something about our lives potentially being in danger makes it somewhat easier to contemplate death.))

Another silence fell upon us, and I hastily thought up of another topic, any other topic, to distract the both of us from those dark thoughts. ((Wonder what day it is now, and what time,)) I said.

((How would I know? I’m not an Andalite with their internal biological clocks,)) Lilten snorted. ((Don’t you have a device on your wrist that tells you the time?))

((Well, I would, but whoever took us took my watch as well,)) I groaned. ((At least it was the Rolez and not the Rolex Dad gave me for my birthday.))

((Ah, yes, of course. Remind me again which one of those is the cheap one.))

Before I could respond, a metal door built into the rock slid open, and two Hork-Bajir walked in. One was carrying a miniature Yeerk Pool, a bowl-shaped container that looked like it had been carved from stone but surely had to be made of a much more advanced material. The Hork laid the mini-Pool down to my left and walked out without a word. The other Hork-Bajir had a device that looked like a slide projector, and this he placed on a table right in front of me. And before I could even think about why my captors would put a mini-Pool and a projector inside my cell, a portion of the wall in front of me turned into a window. My little cell had suddenly turned into one of those interrogation rooms you regularly see in cop shows. There was even someone, or something, on the other side of the glass.

The figure on the other side moved closer, and I saw that it was actually an alien, one that looked like those Grays that always loved to abduct people or some shit. I had heard or maybe read somewhere that the Grays were just misidentified Skrit Na, but the alien on the other side of the glass looked nothing like the images and memories of the Skrit Na that Lilten had shown me.

((What in the name of the Kandrona is that _thing_?)) Lilly asked me.

((Hell if I know,)) I replied. ((I’m just as much in the dark as you are!))

“Joanne Jane Young,” the alien called out, and I immediately froze. How in the world did he know my name? I asked the alien just that, but instead of replying he continued, “You are the host to the Yeerk Lilten Eight-Six-Two-One of the Sulp Niar Pool, are you not?”

“Why would you want to know?” I asked back.

“I don’t want to know,” the alien replied. “I already know who you are, Jane, and I know that Lilten is in your head right now. But forgive me. I believe that it is only fair that you know my name since I already know yours. I am Orryst Three-Nine-Nine of the Talb Bannu Pool. And unfortunately for you, I am the Yeerk assigned to make you suffer.”

“What? Suffer? Why? I didn’t do anything to you!” I cried out. “Lilten didn’t do anything to you! She’s not even Peace Movement! Hey! Answer me! Why are you doing this!?” But Orryst refused to answer my questions; instead, the window turned opaque once again and the projector began to light up. But instead of a white light as I expected, a red beam shot out of the lens and landed on my head. All sorts of ideas began running around in my head about what this beam could possibly do to me, and as I heard the humming from the machine grow louder and louder, I closed my eyes and braced myself for what was to come.

* * *

_I was back in high school, on the beach where the Sharing was holding one of their usual “community outreach” events. I had been an “associate member” (the last level of membership before “full” membership) of the Sharing for almost the whole of the school year. Three months before, I had been told that I was on the fast track to full membership so I was assigned to a full member for some sort of apprenticeship. The full member, a woman named Amanda who was probably just a year or two older than me, would show me the ropes, so to speak, and generally just prepare me for the moment when I was finally considered ready to become a full member myself. Amanda seemed really excited for me to have been on the shortlist; too excited in fact. I had asked her about it, just what exactly it was about being a full member that was so amazing, but on that matter Amanda remained tight-lipped. “Let’s just say that it’s… life-changing,” I remember her telling me when I asked her for like the thousandth time already._

_So there I was on the beach, minding my own business and helping out the other Sharing members when they asked me. I had finally managed to find a spot to sit down after helping to distribute food and drinks, but it felt as if I had barely settled my bottom on the bench when I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up and saw that it was Amanda. “Hey, Jane,” she said. “Are you ready?”_

_“Ready?” I asked back. “For what?”_

_“Ready to become part of something bigger than just yourself, of course,” Amanda replied with a laugh. “Haven’t you been listening to me these past few months?”_

_I must have had the most dumbfounded look on my face at that moment because Amanda immediately clarified herself. “It’s time, Jane,” she said. “It’s time for you to become a full member of the Sharing.”_

_“Oh, wow,” I muttered. Now that I had not been expecting. “Really? Right now?” I asked._

_“Yes, Jane, right now,” Amanda nodded. She was still smiling but now I could sense a bit of annoyance from her._

_“I mean, seriously? Right now? Right in the middle of a beach party?” I continued. “Is it normal for you guys to initiate full members during beach parties?”_

_“We initiate full members 24/7, Jane,” Amanda replied. “It just so happens that you are one of the lucky few who have been chosen for full membership today. Now come on. The Sharing does not like to be kept waiting.”_

_I followed Amanda to the hotel that the Sharing had rented for this event. But instead of going to the lobby as I expected, Amanda led me to the service entrance used by the employees to get to work out of sight of the guests. “What are we doing here?” I asked her. “Shouldn’t we be not here at all?”_

_“Don’t worry, Jane,” Amanda said knowingly. “We won’t get caught.” The certainty of her tone caught me off-guard, along with what came next. “Now, better save all your questions until the end of the orientation or else you might have nothing left to ask.”_

_“Okay,” I said, mostly out of getting a little bit weirded out than anything else. But I decided to set my doubts and fears aside. Maybe the Sharing just loved scaring and hazing their full members a little bit, and Amanda was enjoying the experience because she was finally dishing it out after having been on the receiving end during her initiation. Oh, if only it were that simple…_

_Amanda walked up to the emergency stairwell and pushed it open. She then led me down the stairs into the basement parking, but instead of going there she went to a door marked AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY. There wasn’t a knob on the door, just a tumbler lock and a metal plate. Amanda laid her hand on the metal plate for a few seconds, and then I heard the door being unlocked. That should have told me that something deeper than just a regular initiation was afoot, but yet again I ignored the warning signs._

_A tunnel lay beyond the door that Amanda had just opened with her hand. It appeared to have been carved right out of the soil. The floor had been paved with concrete and the roof made out of soil packed to smoothness. We walked down this tunnel before finally entering a room built into the side. There were a few people already inside the room, either on their own or in pairs. The way that Amanda greeted some of the people in the pairs told me that these ones were also full members with their protégés. Most of the people inside were around my age, but there were a handful of adults as well as a girl and boy pair maybe between seven and nine. “Take a seat, Jane,” Amanda told me, and I took up a spot behind the two kids. Amanda sat down beside me and said, “I’m really excited for you, Jane. I’m really happy for you. You’re about to become part of a better future for this planet.”_

_“Um, okay, whatever you say,” I muttered. Amanda must be really dedicated member to the Sharing if this was how she felt about me becoming a full member._

_We waited in this room for fifteen minutes before two men large enough to be bouncers went in from a side entrance with a table that had a large rectangular thing on top. The two bouncer dudes then went out and another man, this one looking more like a surfer (long hair bleached blonde by the sun, lean muscles, and a perfect tan) went in. He stood before the table and clasped his hands together. “Hello, everyone,” he said. “Some of you in this room already know me, but for the others who don’t, let me introduce myself. My name is Sam, and I am a full member of the Sharing, just as you are about to become._

_“Now you’re probably wondering, ‘Why have I been chosen for full membership?’ For some of us in here, that process took only a few weeks, a month at month. Others have spent years as an associate member before finally getting elevated to full membership,” Sam continued. “So why now? Well, the answer to that is simple: we need new full members. Yes, it’s as simple as that.”_

_People began to murmur and talk between themselves about what Sam had just talked about. Some of them seemed genuinely excited by the prospect of becoming a full member. I can only imagine what those same people were thinking of these events now._

_“But what’s not so simple,” Sam added, “is how exactly you become a full member of the Sharing. On one hand, it’s easy. You just make a choice, and that choice won’t even affect your becoming a full member. The mere fact that you are in this room means that you have been destined to become a full member. On the other hand, the choice you make will determine how hard, or how easy, the process of becoming a full member will be for you._

_“Now, let me tell you what exactly is this thing behind me,” Sam said. “But before I show them to you, let me describe them first. Imagine, my friends, a creature, born without eyes or ears or any other sensory organs. This creature, not only is it blind and deaf and mute but it’s also small, too small to defend itself against any predator. But this creature has an amazing and uncanny ability. This creature that you are imagining may have no senses at all, but it does have the ability to enter another organism’s head by way of the ears, and once it’s gone past the ear, this creature can flatten and mold itself to the other creature’s brain and then share and even take control, not only of the second organism’s senses, but also its whole body. Walking, running, talking, eating, everything that the second creature had taken for granted before is now being used by this first creature now in its head, a creature that most certainly appreciates all these senses a lot more than the other creature ever could. Can you imagine such a creature? Are you imagining it right now? Well, my friends, imagine no longer, for before you I am about to show such a creature that actually exists!” Sam took hold of the cloth covering the rectangle thing on the table and pulled it away, revealing a fishing tank filled with a translucent grayish liquid. And, within this liquid swam, or floated, at least half a dozen greenish-gray… slugs, for lack of a better word for them, although I was about to find out what they were really called._

_“What the hell are those!?” one of the male teens shouted._

_“These, my friends, are Yeerks,” Sam said calmly. “These are the very creatures that I have told you to imagine before. Yes, they are real. Yes, they exist. And yes, everything I have just told you about them is true. Even the part where they crawl into someone’s head and take control of the senses and the body. Especially that part. That part is actually what makes Yeerks unique from every other race in this galaxy.”_

_“Bruh, are you serious about this?” the same guy who had yelled out upon seeing the Yeerks demanded to know._

_“Yes, Derek, I am indeed serious,” Sam replied._

_“No,” Derek shot back. “You know what? Fuck this. Fuck you. I don’t know what you guys are smoking but I don’t want any part of it. And I don’t care if this is part of some fucking initiation. This shit ain’t worth it.” Derek then stood up and left the room through the same door that all of us prospective full members had come in. Another guy, the one sitting beside Derek, stood up and chased after his friend. “Yo, bro, wait up!” he called out as he went through the door as well._

_“Ah, such a shame,” Sam said, shaking his head. “Some people are simply not ready for this grand revelation. But I am sure that he can be persuaded to believe in good time. But let me get back to the matter at hand. The Yeerks, they have come to this planet from thousands of light years away to this planet, our planet, with but one simple request: that we share our senses, our body, with them.”_

_There was a pause before someone spoke up again. “That’s it?” a woman with short blond hair asked Sam. “That’s all that those… things are asking of us?”_

_“Nothing more and nothing less,” Sam replied with a straight face. “So, Linda, will you do it? Will you share your body and your mind with one of our extraterrestrial friends?”_

_Linda hesitated, whatever answer she had decided on dying on her lips. Another silence descended upon the room before a third person, a man maybe in his mid-thirties, asked another question. “This… this isn’t deadly, right?” he asked. “Because I’ve seen the movies, and usually when the alien takes over a human the human dies and only the alien is left behind. If I let one of those Yeerks in my head, and I’m not saying I will yet, what’s my assurance that I will still be me, and not just some alien impostor?”_

_“I assure you, Bronson, that you will not be harmed by our Yeerk friends,” Sam said. “You will retain your memories, your personality, the things that make you you. All you have to do is share your body with your Yeerk so that it can carry out its duties. You will still be able to perceive everything that your Yeerk does through your body. Nobody needs to die or be harmed by this. All we ask of you is a little cooperation.”_

_“So you’re telling me that to become a full member of the Sharing, we all have to let those slug things, whatever you call them, into our heads and use our bodies?” Bronson asked._

_Sam nodded his head. “I believe I’ve mentioned this more than enough times,” he added._

_“And you said that you were a full member, right? Which means that you’ve got one of those things in your head. Can it speak to us?” Bronson asked. “Will it speak to us? Or is talking to us humans beneath its duties?”_

_“There is no need for sarcasm here, Bronson,” Sam said. He then straightened himself out, adopting a more formal standing pose. “I am Eldril One-Nine-Two of the Kes Shaan Pool. I am the Yeerk currently residing in the head of the human known as Samuel Chase. In truth, I have been the one speaking to you all along. I merely pretended to be Sam in order to make your introduction to our species an easier and more palatable experience for you humans to comprehend, and for that I apologize. But now, the truth is finally revealed. Welcome to the Sharing. Now who here will lend their bodies to help my Yeerk brothers and sisters?”_

_Another silence descended upon the room as those inside who were not yet full members absorbed and tried to understand what they had just heard from Sam or Eldril, whoever really was speaking to us. There were uneasy glances at the other full members in the room, the mentors who had been guiding us on the path to full membership. I looked at Amanda, my Sharing mentor, and tried to imagine one of those Yeerk things hiding inside her head, looking back at me through those steel gray eyes. Amanda, or more likely the alien inside her head, smiled back at me, as if to reassure me that everything was all right between it and her. I turned away, unsure of what I would have done or said if I kept on looking at her._

_And then, to everyone’s surprise, the little boy stood up and said, “I’ll do it.” There were a few gasps and murmurs from the adult would-be full members in the room at the sight of this seven-year-old boy being the first one out of all the people in the room to make the leap of faith with the Yeerks. A smile went across Sam/Eldril’s face, and he walked over to the boy. “Your name is Joey, yes?” he asked._

_“Yes,” the boy nodded, and at that moment he sounded quite a bit more scared than he had when he stood up and said that he was going to be the first one to give up his body to a Yeerk._

_“Good, good, excellent,” Eldril nodded. “And your mentor is Kathleen, I see,” he added, referring to the girl with Joey. “Kathleen will take you to where you will receive your Yeerk, Joey. Thank you for taking what has to be a big step for a juvenile human. Welcome to the Sharing.”_

_Kathleen nodded at Joey and took his hand, and together they went through the side entrance from where the two bouncer types had wheeled out the aquarium with the Yeerks floating inside. Eldril then turned back to the room and asked, “Who else here would like to make the leap of faith and secure your place as a full member of the Sharing?”_

_Once again there was hesitation among the rest of us; nobody wanted to make the first move but nobody wanted to be the last one through as well. Then Bronson stood up and said, “I’ll do it too.”_

_“An excellent choice, Bronson,” Eldril exclaimed. “Your friend Carl will help you along to the place where your Yeerk awaits. Welcome to the Sharing, Mr. Reitlinger.” Once the two men had gone through the side entrance as well, Eldril asked again, “Anyone else?”_

_To this day I’m not sure why I did what I did. Maybe the fact that there was no escaping this had not gotten through to me just yet. All I knew was that I stood up, and Eldril looked at me expecting me to say I’m gonna do it too, only for me to say, “I’m sorry. I can’t do this.”_

_“I’m sorry?” Eldril repeated. “What do you mean, you can’t do this, Jane?”_

_“I can’t do this. I’m not ready for this. I’m sorry. I just can’t!” I said, and then I scrambled out of that room as fast as my feet could take me, an attempt not helped by the fact that I had to get around Amanda before I could even run for the main door. But I managed to make it out, but I had barely made it a step away from the door before I heard Amanda calling out to me. “Jane, wait!”_

_“I’m sorry, Amanda, but I just can’t do it!” I shouted back at her. “When you said becoming a full member would be life-changing for me, I thought you were just exaggerating!”_

_“But why?” Amanda asked me. “What’s wrong? Are you not interested in sharing your body with another being who lacks the basic senses that you have?”_

_“Look, I don’t wanna talk about any of that right now, okay?” I said. “It’s just… I’m not sure I’m the right person for this! I’m not sure you even need me for this. You’ve got lots of other guys who might actually agree to putting an alien in their heads!”_

_“But you’re about to become a full member of the Sharing!” Amanda replied. “Surely this is a small price to pay for the chance to be part of history.”_

_“Look, Amanda, or whatever your name really is,” I continued, “maybe I don’t want to become a full member anymore. Maybe I never wanted to become a full member in the first place. Maybe I’m just fine with being an associate member!”_

_Amanda’s shoulders sagged, and a frown formed on her face. “I’m sorry that you think that way, Jane,” she said. “But I’m also afraid that you are misunderstanding something. You have been selected for full membership in the Sharing, and that is not an honor that is given lightly. And the Sharing doesn’t like it when someone refuses to become a full member.”_

_“What are you trying to say?” I asked, the alarm bells starting to ring inside my head._

_“It means that, like it or not, you are going to walk out of here a full member, Jane,” Amanda said sadly. “And unfortunately for you, you have chosen the difficult path to initiation. Now.”_

_“What?” It took me only a moment to realize that the last word was not addressed to me, but it would be a moment too late for me to react. Without warning I felt two huge presences behind me, and then two pairs of arms covered in sharp-looking blades grabbed my arms. “The fuck!?” I exclaimed. “What’s this all about?”_

_“I told you, Jane,” Amanda, or more accurately the alien hiding behind Amanda’s face, replied. “You_ will _become a full member of the Sharing. And unfortunately for you, you chose the difficult path. Take her to the Pool,” she told the two massive walking blades flanking me._

_I tried to escape from the two walking blades, to break free from their grasp and get away from this place as fast as possible, but the two aliens (they had to be aliens; there’s nothing on Earth that looks remotely like these things) lifted me off of the ground and literally carried me down the earthen tunnel. The screams reached my ears soon after that, and when I was dragged into what I was about to learn was the Yeerk Pool, I made a terrifying conclusion: Hell was a real place, and it had arrived here on Earth from space._

* * *

“Have you collected the necessary samples?”

“Yes, we have, Sub-Visser. We have more than enough samples on which to run the entire test battery.”

The red beam on my forehead blinked and faded away, and I slumped down exhausted on the chair holding me. A middle-aged human wearing glasses and a white lab coat was standing beside me, and he had a strange device in his hand that looked like a cross between a syringe and a gun.

“Take the prisoner back to their cell,” Orryst, the Sub-Visser in the Gray alien-looking being, ordered, and two Hork-Bajir entered the room to comply with his order. They lifted me up out of the seat and carried me out of the room, through more tunnels carved out of the rock, and then they deposited me into a small cell. The Hork guards walked out of the cell, and a Gleet BioFilter flickered to life between me and them.

((Lilly? Lilly?)) I called out in my mind. ((You still there?))

((Yes, Jane, I’m still here,)) Lilten replied, but her voice sounded weak, distant. She sounded like she was not completely connected to my brain at that moment.

((What are they doing to us, Lilten?)) I asked her. ((What do they want with us?))

((I wish I knew the answer, Jane,)) Lilly muttered back. ((I wish I could give you an answer that I knew or believed in.))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What’s up, guys? Yes, I’m back. This chapter took me a long time to get through, mostly because I’ve been busy with dealing with real life as well as other things. However, I can’t say that this is my return to regular updates, but this is my assurance to you that I’m still here and working on this stories, as well as all my other stories. And as always, feel free to leave a review or a comment, a follow or a favorite or some kudos. I always appreciate feedback. Thank you! – GR

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, I’m back! And with perhaps one of the longest chapters I have ever written. This is the start of the official part two of my After the War series, the one which is an actual sequel and not a mid-quel or whatever you call something that’s set in the middle of a story. This one was quite a long time in the making, and I don’t know how often I will be able to update, but I do hope you appreciate it all the same. As always, leave a review or a comment if you feel like saying something, anything, about my story. Whether it’s constructive criticism or just saying you like it is fine by me. Thanks! - GR


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